Yesterday afternoon and evening, most leftist politicians and media members didn't have time to root against the United States in the World Cup. They were all too busy imitating Denethor in The Return of the King after the latest allegations dropped against the Nazi tattoo guy in Maine, Graham Platner.
Of course, while the left was scrubbing their Twitter history and complaining that Platner had 'never been vetted,' Democrats continued to ignore the fact that he had already been credibly accused of abusing women.
Maybe it's OK with them if it's a Republican woman he assaulted?
Speaking of 'kings,' however, not everyone was running for the hills and throwing Platner under the bus. Fellow Mainer and notorious elderly lesbian aunt Stephen King made it very clear to everyone on social media that Platner was still his guy.
Graham Platner may drop out. (I hope he doesn't, but.) Meanwhile, the Abuser in Chief just keeps on keepin' on.
— Stephen King (@StephenKing) July 6, 2026
We're trying to figure out King's logic here. Is he saying that it's OK for Platner to be elected to the Senate because he is claiming, without evidence, that Donald Trump is also a rapist?
That seems to be the case. In a follow-up post, King also justified Platner's candidacy because he's got dirt on many other Senators and Representatives.
Tell you what--if you knew the whole truth about everyone in the Senate and House of Reps, those chambers would be dead empty. Jesus said, "Let him without sin cast the first stone."
— Stephen King (@StephenKing) July 6, 2026
Yikes. Does King know that 'whole truth'? If so, why is he keeping it to himself?
We do not doubt that there are many scandals involving elected officials in office that have not destroyed their careers ... yet. Just look at how long Democrats turned a blind eye to Eric Swalwell.
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What we're trying to figure out is why King believes that we should add even MORE sexual abusers to Congress. And why does he believe that Jesus thinks we should do that as well?
“Love thy Nazi rapist.”
— 🫃🏼💉🇺🇦🇮🇷🇨🇺Hollaria Briden, Esq. (@HollyBriden) July 6, 2026
~ Jesus
We love Holly Briden, but we're pretty sure Jesus never said that.
Stephen, are you saying voters shouldn’t judge Platner for these allegations?
— Burt Macklin (@BurtMaclin_FBI) July 6, 2026
Yes, that indeed seems to be what he is saying.
A wild scene watching you defend rape
— The Dank Knight 🦇 (@capeandcowell) July 6, 2026
We've seen some doozies from King over the years. Like that time he claimed Joe Biden was 'doing his job' while he was sleeping on a Delaware beach.
But this one might win the gold medal for all-time lunatic takes from the aging author.
Bro. Holy s***.
— Mickey Blowtorch (@MickeyBlowtorch) July 7, 2026
Seeing as how King invoked Christ, we think 'Holy S-word' is the correct reaction here.
I don’t know any rapists, but then again, I’m not a Democrat.
— TheMorningSpew2 (@TheMorningSpew2) July 7, 2026
It's weird how many 'feminist men' in the Democrat Party are always the ones who are most abusive toward women.
Wouldn't you agree, Doug Emhoff?
“Who among us hasn’t done a little rape???” -Stephen King, basically https://t.co/0oa2OPXOny
— Sara Gonzales (@SaraGonzalesTX) July 7, 2026
It makes us queasy all over again thinking about that creepy sex scene in his novel, IT.
The scene that was so revolting that BOTH movie adaptations of the book removed it completely.
LOLOLOLOL. So because we don’t know about hypothetical rapey legislators we should forgive the ones we do know about. https://t.co/P1ojzFV6qM
— Jonah Goldberg (@JonahDispatch) July 6, 2026
Democrats are known for their pretzel logic. But if even Jonah Goldberg is laughing at this attempt from King, that's how we know it is truly awful.
This is literally saying "ignore rape because everyone does it"
— Shoshana Weissmann, Sloth Committee Chair 🦥 (@senatorshoshana) July 6, 2026
Hell of a view https://t.co/KDgebjkk35
Even worse, King is claiming that this is what Jesus would say about an abusive Nazi sexual predator.
He must be reading a different Gospel than everyone else has. (Maybe one he wrote during his cocaine years.)
Your continued defense of Platner is more horrifying than anything you've written https://t.co/eIs80XZuUB
— James Kirchick (@jkirchick) July 6, 2026
Susan Collins isn’t a Nazi rapist bro https://t.co/NctbuAEECF
— Kyle Smith (@rkylesmith) July 6, 2026
It will never stop being hilarious that Democrat politicians and the leftist media tried to paint Collins as a 'fascist,' when their guy was actually sporting an SS death squad tattoo on his chest.
And, unbelievably, the Nazi tattoo turned out to be maybe the LEAST repugnant thing about Platner.
I’ve never raped anyone.
— The🐰FOO (@PolitiBunny) July 7, 2026
I will cast the first stone here, weirdo. https://t.co/fuqwCJ5sK1
We're not going to get into an extensive analysis of Jesus or his teachings in this article, but suffice it to say, we're pretty sure that Christ would have been just fine with us casting stones at a dude who has as many violent and abusive skeletons tumbling out of his Porta-Potty as Platner does.
In fact, we're pretty sure that Jesus would demand that we deal with such a person pretty harshly.
If King weren't so consumed by his TDS and tribal politics, he might realize the truth about Platner as well: that he's as bad as any villain that Stephen King has ever -- or could ever -- come up with for any of his horror novels.
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