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Where's the Lie, Spud? Brian Stelter Wants Everyone to Know He Can Read Newspaper Headlines

Twitchy

For years, we've been trying to figure out what purpose Brian 'Potato' Stelter actually serves in the modern media landscape, and we still haven't come up with anything. 

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In his first career at CNN, Stelter seemed to exist only to watch Fox News (Tucker Carlson, in particular) and then tell everyone how much he disliked him. For that, CNN paid him nearly $1 million per year (until they fired him in 2022 after the failure of his CNN+ baby). 

Bafflingly, CNN has brought him back (at severely reduced pay, we hope), and Stelter still defies all explanation of what he does for a living, other than being a doughy punching bag for conservatives and sane people. 

His X account is no different, where most of his posts consist of, 'Look what I saw!' We sure hope Elon Musk is not monetizing him for that. 

This morning, the Potato showed everyone that he could read a newspaper headline, which, honestly, is something we had our doubts about. 

Hang on a second. Local paper? Stelter lives in New Jersey. The Baltimore Sun is not his 'local paper.'

But his geographic confusion aside, Stelter's objective is the same as it was back when he was the host of Reliable Sources. He wants everyone to share his outrage at Donald Trump. 

There's only one problem: Baltimore IS a hellhole. If Stelter were indeed a 'local,' he would know that. 

All of Baltimore's failures aren't exactly classified information. 

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You would rather reflexively oppose anything this administration does than care about what the people are saying.

We have reported in the past about the rampant crime in Baltimore, but Stelter doesn't care. Trump said something he thought was mean, and it made him cry. 

If Stelter doesn't think it's a hellhole, we'd like to challenge him to walk around the city alone at night, kind of like we challenged J.B. Pritzker

And it's not just in the crime rate. Baltimore is an educational failure as well. 

The fact that Stelter can read a newspaper headline means that he probably didn't go to a Baltimore public school. 

Why should he be concerned? He doesn't live there. And he won't be raising his children there. 

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The entire television show was about how crime-ridden and corrupt every aspect of the city is, and it hasn't exactly gotten better since The Wire's final episode in 2008.  

No. He does not. 

Potato doesn't know. 

There aren't enough pearls in the world for Stelter to clutch them all simply because the President told the truth. 

And, by the way, where exactly is Potato reading his newspaper, anyway? 

LOL. 

That is some fast-food restaurant-looking tile, that's for sure. 

Ultimately, however, despite his latest failed attempt to stoke outrage, Stelter is still not able to answer our burning question: what it is that he actually does. 

He's not making $1 million a year anymore, but Potato will keep trying to go back to that well, no matter how much it has dried up.

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Useless. 

Yes, that describes Brian Stelter perfectly. 

Useless and extremely pudgy. 

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Editor's Note: The mainstream media continues to deflect, gaslight, spin, and lie about President Trump, his administration, and conservatives.

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