In September of 2023, we told you all about some TOTALLY REALISTIC ALIEN BODIES found in Peru. Boy, we had fun writing that one up, but now we have a SHOCKING update. They have been proven to NOT be aliens.
Sit down if you have to. We understand. We were shocked too. But the freaky part is what they turned out to be. Forensic Experts say they are dolls, which we all assumed was the case, but they are made from paper, glue, metal, and ... human and animal BONES.
Those 'aliens' found in Peru? They're definitely not real, forensics experts say. https://t.co/mPqTZUs0ew
— Globalnews.ca (@globalnews) January 15, 2024
READ MORE: https://t.co/mPqTZUs0ew
HUMAN AND ANIMAL BONES!!! Apparently, there was a three-fingered hand along with the aliens in September but we were so focussed on the mini-ETs that we missed that altogether. The forensics show the weird little hand to be made from human bones as well. EWWW!
👽 MEXICAN ALIENS NOT REAL 🛸
— Aditya Rathore (@imAdityaRathore) January 14, 2024
"Aliens" found in Peru are actually dolls made of bones.
"They are not extraterrestrials, they are not intraterrestrials”#alien #Aliens #MiamiAlien #ufo #UFOs #ufoX pic.twitter.com/3zolqKbhiJ
The photos in that post are great. We can not figure out how in the world they are FAKE. They seem so realistic. Particularly with the little red dress and fancy shoes in the second image. We are SHOCKED we tell you. SHOCKED!
Posters on X had some fun with the news as well.
As long as you tell me the cake versions were real, I forgive you. https://t.co/8u2Is6olUt https://t.co/tKNBXTe8Cp
— Dawn (@aurora_g96) January 21, 2024
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*SNORT* In the cake versions were they gray and shriveled with no clothes or did they break out the fondant and make a fancy red dress? hahahaha.
No kidding?
— CrabMonster2 (@CrabMonster2) January 21, 2024
Right? We can not believe it. When we wrote it up in September we were CERTAIN it was the first of many sightings of miniature 'ET meets a Gremlin that was fed after midnight' super aliens to come.
The fact that it was a papier mache ET from 1986 gave it away...js
— PoliticsJunkie45013 (@poljunkie45013) January 21, 2024
NEVER! They totally looked like real aliens and It was not ONLY papier mache, it had bones too!
Of course they would say that so we don’t panic.
— Vince (@VGmt0800) January 21, 2024
He has a point.
Marked safe from alien invasion. 🚩
— ʞɹıɯ𝕊 (@FoundersGirl) January 21, 2024
The miserable human existence continues. https://t.co/Xc9oyLq4bj
Existence seems like a positive thing but we get it. :)
Well, according to Biden, the aliens on the southern border aren’t real, either. https://t.co/48AKoMr55k
— TheMorningSpew2 (@TheMorningSpew2) January 21, 2024
HA! That is true. Biden says a lot of stupid things. We imagine Biden looking at the little Aliens saying 'I mean, you got the first mainstream Alien-Americans here who could have been articulate and bright and clean and nice-looking beings. I mean, that's a storybook, man. If only the GOP had not made it so hard to find a pathway to citizenship they may be alive and real today!'
That last quote was a play on a few of Biden's real quotes. We felt we needed to clarify for everyone since he does say some stupid stuff.
We promise to let you know when any FOR REAL FOR REAL aliens show up. Until then, Nanu, Nanu, Mork From Ork Signing out.
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