In case you weren’t angry enough about what the federal government has been doing to Americans for the past few years, this thread from Ann Bauer that reads as a letter from the government to a small cabinetmaker oughta do the trick.
She managed to hit each and every point just perfectly.
Take a gander:
Hey small cabinetmaker, you have to close the shop your family has owned for 100 years – because of a virus that mostly affects 80-year-olds. I know your staff is mostly guys in their 30s, but whatev. Also Home Depot can stay open and sell cabinets. Because. But wait! We'll x/1
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
Target, Home Depot, Walmart … all of these big box stores were AOK but you small businesses? SORRY, gotta shut ya’ down to keep ya’ safe. But don’t worry, we’ll pretend we care about you and come up with some government spending program.
That will go to mainly wealthy politicians and our pals.
Ahem.
give you a loan – PPP – to pay those guys while you're closed for 2 weeks, or 4 or maybe 4 months, or 6. All you need to do is rush to your bank and fill out mountains of paperwork. And yes, wealthy politicians will be at the front of the line for these funds, plus we're not x/2
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
Banks that were so overwhelmed they couldn’t keep up with the demand.
Keep going.
putting in appropriate safeguards, so scammers will get a ton of it, but give it a try! You might get lucky.
See? We gave you a loan that almost, but not quite paid your 4 guys' salaries plus benefits and maybe kept your business afloat. Except….shoot. We closed down the x/3
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
Recommended
Oops.
the country, well, OK, really the world, and printed gobs of money, so when you're finally allowed to open there MIGHT be a tiny bit of inflation. Also, um, supply chain problems. Sure Home Depot will yet again be ahead of you in line for items because, well, they stayed open x/4
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
Tiny bit of inflation.
HA HA HA HA HA
Nailed it.
because SCIENCE. So good luck with all that. Lumber prices, no tools, workers gained weight staying home and two of them have type 2 diabetes now – which your self-funded health plan is covering. Yup, sorry. Them are the breaks.
Now, we need to relieve the stress on people x/5
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
Oh, that’s right, the stress.
SO MUCH STRESS.
who have *really* suffered: master's degree students who are carrying student debt from their undergrad degrees. Sure, maybe they should've tried a community college first, then gone to a university. But some people NEED the experience of a small same-minded school like, say, x/6
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
This.^
Grinnell. What's wrong with you? Are you against education? We're only going to forgive $10K of their debt. On your taxpayer dime. Well, maybe $20K. And they don't have to pay anything, no matter what their balance yet this year. Because, election. Sshh. We did not say that! x/7
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
Oh, really, you object to this, guy who apprenticed with his father from the age of 18 and sustained a business that is now a hair's breadth from going under for good? You don't want your money going for these student loans? You, sir, are a bigot. And remember that PPP loan x/8
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
Bigots.
Fascists.
Nazis.
Good times.
And a Trumper!
Hey people, YMMV. If you're in a state where some cabinetmakers stayed open, substitute piano tuners, cafe owners, bookstores, wicker basket shops… You get the idea. Apply as needed.
— Ann Bauer (@annbauerwriter) August 27, 2022
Yup, our government did ALL of this (and more).
Infuriating, ain’t it?
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