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They're Desperate: CBS News Tries to Gin Up the 'Joy' With Poll About Kamala's 'Excitement Factor'

Gif meme

After a month or more of media fluff, things are not panning out for Kamala Harris the way Barack Obama had hoped. Hey, don't look at us that way. We all know that a Harris first term would be an Obama fourth term, just like Biden's first term was Obama's third term. 

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Unfortunately, those pesky American voters aren't buying the 'joy.'

Yesterday, statistician Nate Silver released a new election odds prediction and it is all bad news for the Harris campaign. 

Yikes. Sound the alarms. 

Of course, elections aren't decided on polls or predictions, so anything could still happen, but we are not surprised to see the Democrats in full panic mode. We have seen it from Aaron Rupar and David Hogg in recent days. (Have we mentioned how hilarious it is to see Hogg talking about masculinity? Because we would like to mention that again.) 

But with all of this dismay from Democrat influencers, who can Harris rely on to try to gin up some more fake joy? This sounds like a job for the mainstream media. Last night, CBS News tried to quell the fear with a new 'excitement poll,' showing Harris doing very well among Democrats in swing states. 

LOL. 'Excitement factor.' 

The first thing to know about excitement polls is that they are completely meaningless. The second thing to know about excitement polls is that they are completely meaningless. 

Basically, all those polls do is measure how enthusiastic people each candidate's own party is about voting for their nominee. The breaking news here? Both Harris voters and Trump voters are pretty revved up to vote for their guy (or girl). 

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Eighty-nine percent of Democrats in Michigan, 82% in Pennsylvania and 87% in Wisconsin say they're excited by Harris campaign. By comparison, among Republicans, 78% said the same of Trump in Michigan, 75% in Pennsylvania and 76% in Wisconsin. 

Now, Democrats in the three battleground states are also just as likely as Republicans to say they will definitely vote, as Harris has consolidated the votes among the party's base. But Trump leads in the states among some key issues, including the economy and inflation.

Oh, that pesky economy and inflation. 

Here is all this poll tells anyone: Democrats were dead in the water with Joe Biden, probably heading for a defeat of gigantic proportions in November, unseen since George McGovern in 1972 or maybe Walter Mondale in 1984. Now, they actually have a living, breathing human being they can vote for.

Yippee. She has a pulse. Can you feel the joyous energy?

There will be no zoo animals to hunt down because the illegal Haitian immigrants may have eaten them all already. 

HAHAHAHAHA. 

By the way, the side-by-side is made up, obviously, but that is a real Harris quote, talking about lipstick on coffee lids for some unimaginable reason. 

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This was before her handlers forced her to tone down her insane cackle. 

That is why 'excitement polls' are useless. Yes, Democrats will get out their vote for Harris, even to their own detriment. But that group cannot win statewide or nationwide elections. They need independents for that. Independents vote based on their wallets more than anything else, and certainly not on their 'joy.'

Like we said, completely irrelevant. Especially when it is this close. It might be news if there was a large gap, for instance when Biden's shuffling corpse was running for president and Trump had a HUGE (maybe even 'YUGE') lead in voter enthusiasm. But that's about it.

This is the correct reaction to the CBS poll. 

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Even CBS was forced to admit in its article that Trump still leads on all of these important issues where swing votes are decided. 

We checked with the grocery store, the gas station, and the gas company. Sadly for Harris, none of them accept 'joy' as a form of payment. 

You can be very sure that if Trump had a slight lead in this polling category, that would have been meaningless as well, but CBS would have never published this article.

Technically, 'Democrat Party controlled media,' but we'll accept it. 

It is nauseating, but they are really bad at it, so that makes it kind of funny too. 

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Tonight is the first (and likely only) presidential debate. No matter what kind of agitprop CBS News tries to push about excitement, this debate is do or die for Kamala Harris. If she does well, this will be a close race until November. If not, Harris may continue to sink for the next two months (unless the Democrats pull another switcheroo and don't think there aren't operatives contemplating that very thing).

No matter how she does, we're sure the usual suspects -- CBS, CNN, ABC, NBC, MSNBC, etc. -- will praise her performance. They probably have their post-debate spin already written. The problem is, Americans don't believe or trust them anymore. 

And if they'd like to know why not, all they have to do is look at this 'excitement poll' from CBS. 

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