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Garbage Time: Coach Kamala Delivers Platitudinous Pep Talk to Locker Room Full of WNBA Players

AP Photo/Godofredo A. Vásquez

Failed presidential candidate Kamala Harris delivered some platitudes with attitude to a locker room of WNBA players on Friday evening. The professional women’s basketball league is in the news again thanks to players violently targeting Indiana Fever's Caitlin Clark. Otherwise, most of the nation would be unaware of the league.

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Harris tritely spoke to players who appeared enraptured by her every meaningless word. (WATCH)

No one has lost any sleep over WNBA championship teams skipping the White House during President Donald Trump’s two terms.

Posters marveled at Harris’s worldview and word choice.

‘[People who] also don’t know you exist.’ Harris was encouraging WNBA players by telling them most people don’t know who they are or that they even exist. Thanks, Coach Kamala!

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Posters imagined what Harris would sound like describing the game of basketball.

"In basketball, the ball is round, and the basket is round, but the basket is bigger around than the ball, so the ball can go through the basket, but the ball can't get through the basket by itself. That's why we need all of you to work hard to put the ball through the basket because that is the only way we win, but we only win if it goes through the right basket, so you must be careful not to put it through the wrong basket because that would be bad...and uh...welll... there you have it."

— Sam Ward (@godsavecroatia) July 12, 2026

It really does.

Commenters say they’re tired of Harris infantilizing adults.

A lot of them certainly act like children.

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Posters hope Harris is inspired by her own nonsensical ramblings and decides to run for the White House in 2028.

It would give her a chance to develop her ball-handling skills. Suit up, Kamala, the WNBA needs you!

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