It’s coming! CNN+ is coming! Subscribers will have access to all kinds of exclusive programming.

Like bonus Rex Chapman!

And bonus Don Lemon!

And bonus Brian Stelter!

And it’ll only set you back $5.99 a month or $59.99 a year!

Unless, of course, you’re one of the smart subscribers who thinks to sign up early and take advantage of the “Deal of a Lifetime”:

A lifetime of 24/7 CNN+ programming! For life!

Operators are standing by.

Now there’s an idea.

Nobody’s gonna watch it unless CNN+ has some genuinely extra-special top-quality programming. Tweeters have actually offered up some pretty good suggestions:

Great suggestions, all. But, much like CNN’s record of journalistic malpractice and all-around inferiority, the possibilities are endless. Keep ’em coming!

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