Need a little break from politics? Hey man, we get it, we need breaks here and there too and this ‘tale’ from Steak_Umm may be one of our favorite things on Twitter EVER.

You’re welcome.

Beeflings are a thing. Who knew?

Anyone else feel like they’re reading ‘Lord of the Rings’ here? C’mon people, crack a book.

Side note, beef elder sounds like a ska band from the ’90s.

Fish Queen was surely mellifluous as most fish queens are … yeah?

Not up on your fish queen lore? Fair.

The fate of all meat is now in the hands of Steak-Umm.

We snickered.

Beware the Hot Pocket … HA HA HA HA. You know those things are filled with phlogiston, right?

Sheesh, and we thought Tolkien was wordy.

KIDDING.

We love Steak-Umm.

Wait, what? Nicolas Cage?

K.

All meats could live in harmony once more.

Heh.

Steak-Umm bless … nice touch.

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