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When Democrats Marry: Have a Seat for the Most Awful Wedding EVER (But First, There's Homework)

Twitchy

Everyone loves a June wedding, right? 

The warm weather, the fragrant flowers, the bride's beautiful gown, the spreadsheets, the questionnaires, the breakout sessions ...

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Wait ... what? 

Welcome to wedding ceremonies as held by the wokest of the woke left. 

Yesterday, The New York Times tried to pay homage to the Manhattan nuptials of two of the leftist elite, former Eric Adams senior staffer Rachel Kelly Atcheson and Democrat pollster and lobbyist Sean Adrian McElwee. 

Of course, the two were not married in a church. They officially tied the knot at the Manhattan City Clerk's office. But it was at the reception that the event turned into the nightmarish wedding from Hell. 

Byron York captured the key details about the reception in a screenshot from The Times: 


Good Lord. Just the guest list alone would make any normal person want to schedule a much more pleasant root canal surgery for that day. Plant-based nonprofit employees, alternative protein venture capitalists, hedge fund managers, and lobbyists?

As the saying goes, they must be so much fun at parties. 

But maybe our favorite part is the end, where guests had to answer a purity test questionnaire to attend, and a spreadsheet was shared of everyone who would be there, just to make sure there were no undesirables who could have snuck in. And, of course, who wants gifts on their wedding day? Wouldn't everyone much prefer to force the guests to write a one-page honorific on how wonderfully superior the happy couple is? 

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We might prefer a year in a supermax prison. 

Doesn't this reception violate the Eighth Amendment to the Constitution or something? 

Beelzebub himself couldn't devise a more horrific torture. 

No idea. We're still trying to figure out what 'alternative protein venture capitalists' are. 

Oh, you can bet there was a land acknowledgement. Right before the board games. 

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You just KNOW the wedding planner was an AWFL who works in performance management. 

We've heard of weddings that have a cash bar before, which is fine if the couple doesn't have a lot of money to spend. 

But BYOB? 

And not even a cold beer to wash down the horrible taste of tofuburgers. 

Unless you brought your own. But the couple probably demanded that any beer on site be gluten-free, too. 

Just bring hemlock. It would be quicker. 

We would LOVE to see the questionnaire guests had to fill out to receive an invitation. 

We can't imagine how many genders and pronouns were listed on it. 

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Are crickets vegan? 

You could always say you had a previous engagement at a 'No Kings' protest. 

Virtually every study or research experiment run in the past several years confirms what we already know. Leftists are completely miserable, and they have absurdly high levels of mental illness. 

Looking at this wedding reception from hell thrown by the leftist elite, it's not difficult to figure out why. 

Editor's Note: The Democrat Party has never been less popular as voters reject its globalist agenda.

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