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Premium

The Onion Hasn't Blocked Us Yet, So Lucky Us

Fuzzy Chimp

Last fall, NBC News "dystopia beat" reporter Ben Collins said that he was thinking of leaving journalism … writing a piece every six months was just too taxing, I guess. In April I learned that Collins had purchased satire site The Onion, which isn't that much of a stretch from reporting for NBC News.

Everyone says the same thing about The Onion — it used to be funny. I remember being on dial-up AOL service in the '90 and reading The Onion. I used to read Salon, too … it hadn't gone full progressive yet.

But politics infected The Onion, and it stopped being funny. Look at the resident of the Oval Office right now. If The Onion or "Saturday Night Live" can't find material there, there's no help for them.

Gay Patriot, who's been banned more than anyone else, is back, only to find that The Onion has blocked him.

Emily Zanotti revealed Monday that she's been blocked too.

I checked to see if Twitchy had been blocked by The Onion, but we won't be until after this post goes up. If you've been blocked, RedSteeze has compiled the latest Onion headlines for your amusement.

"Trump defies judge's order to stop pointing a loaded gun at the jury." Good one.

Here's what Gay Patriot is missing.

They don't even make sense anymore and are full of typos. Here's the Mother's Day offerings:


This one's pretty prescient:

The one thing I've learned in writing for Twitchy for the past 12 years is that people are funny. They're way funnier than anyone in the writers' room at "SNL." And they're not doing satire; they're just responding to posts. You know who's funny? David Burge, who took a crack at Monday's offering:

Here's The Onion's take on the war in Gaza:

This is what you get when you have the privilege of not being blocked. The Onion already wasn't funny … now it's even less so. Meanwhile, The Babylon Bee is killing it.

We did a post of Mary Katherine Ham reading headlines from The Onion. Here it is in case you missed it:

It's hard to define "funny," but this stuff is objectively not funny. It's embarrassing. It's not satire.

I don't know how much we can blame Collins for The Onion going from not funny to really not funny. They probably have the same staff, right?

And yes, conservatives can take satire. A funny joke about Donald Trump is a funny joke. Maybe they should hire Rep. Mike Collins:


***


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