Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has given the world 12 more years due to climate change, but of course, her Green New Deal will reverse that trend and keep the planet rotating indefinitely; that is, as long as Congress goes along with it and follows through on her recommendations.
If you’ve been following Twitchy today, you know that the Washington Post’s Dave Weigel assured us that the text of the Green New Deal is not to be taken literally — “Unless you think she was also *literally* discussing a plan to ban cows from farting.”
But she was, and PETA has been on that kick for some time now: the organization has been urging people to stop eating meat so that we don’t need cows anymore. And not only do cows fart, but they also require a great deal of land to be cleared, so trees suffer too.
Washington Post columnist Megan McArdle has read the Green New Deal and found it strange that slaughtering all the cows seems to be what’s holding up the deadline, not renovating or reconstructing every building in America.
The most bizarre passage in the Green New Deal is the admission that after they've junked every car in America, replaced every power plant, and renovated every single building within the space of a decade, they might not get around to slaughtering all the cows by their deadline.
— Megan McArdle (@asymmetricinfo) February 7, 2019
Not making this up: "We set a goal to get to net-zero, rather than zero emissions, in 10 years
because we aren’t sure that we’ll be able to fully get rid of farting cows and
airplanes that fast"— Megan McArdle (@asymmetricinfo) February 7, 2019
“We aren’t sure that we’ll be able to fully get rid of farting cows and airplanes that fast.” Um, how about loading all the cows onto airplanes and crashing them into the ocean? Done and done.
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I mean, I guess you could read this as a plan to genetically engineer cows so that they no longer pass gas?
— Megan McArdle (@asymmetricinfo) February 7, 2019
Sure, they can replace every power plant and rebuild every building in 10 years, but getting rid of airplanes and cows could hold up the works.
The Green new Deal was an overgrown draft that's been taken down & should never have been put up, much like a hideous mac & cheese recipe.
— Downpuppy (@Downpuppy) February 7, 2019
Yeah, it’s already missing from Ocasio-Cortez’s website.
Alexa, who gets to eat the cows once they’re slaughtered????
— Trump Talks to Alexa (@TrumpAsksAlexa) February 7, 2019
the starving will be fighting over the cows and the will be digested in short order.
— HV61 (@HVeritch) February 7, 2019
It’ll be just like the zoo animals in Venezuela.
Slaughtering the cows seems like a recipe for increased carbon emissions – you can't kill all those cows without BBQing them.
— Bob Smith (@Bobqsmith) February 7, 2019
Well by then the cows will have realized what's happening and begun to form militias
— Reluctant Exister (@IriathZhul) February 7, 2019
C’mon, Megan, that was an obvious typo. It said “fully get rid of farting cows”, but should have read “fully get rid of farting cis white males.”
— Robert E. Ferrara (@REF451) February 7, 2019
Good point.
Where are they going to put all the excess waste when they accelerate the cycle of destroying cars and buildings?
— Evan Sparks (@EvanSparks) February 7, 2019
So, now we junk every car. What are we going to do with all of them sitting in junkyards? Landfill? I don't think you can recycle them.
— us_pinay (@us_pinay) February 7, 2019
Not using solar or wind power you can’t.
I'll be busy rebuilding my papier mache condo.
— Dennis Wenmouth (@denniswenmouth) February 7, 2019
And yet most of the media today was like… pic.twitter.com/BtMjz16aWR
— JenniferW (@JenWoodruff79) February 7, 2019
Details, details…tsk tsk
— Marc Posner (@mposner) February 7, 2019
This is so dumb that u kinda worry that maybe u shouldn’t make fun of them because… u know? ????
— Scott Kane (@gcems645) February 7, 2019
And speaking of getting rid of cars and airplanes and moving to high-speed rail: California’s infamous Los Angeles-to-San Francisco bullet train has been delayed another four years, to 2033. But sure, build a nationwide network of bullet trains in ten years.
Related:
FORWARD! Ocasio-Cortez undaunted after Nancy Pelosi dismisses Green New Deal as a ‘green dream’ https://t.co/2xFFel3fHE
— Twitchy Team (@TwitchyTeam) February 7, 2019
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