Chest Defense: Adam Mockler Presents ‘Weird’ Explainer of When Republicans Go Low, Democra...
Australian TV Blames Elon Musk for Inciting Violence for Not Censoring Video of...
Pond Scum: WaPo ‘Journos’ All Wet for Deflecting on Reflecting Pool Renovation Because...
Attorney: The Anthony Family Has Been ‘Legally Lynched’ by This Slaughterhouse of a...
Americans Will Be So Triggered When the Whole Planet Cheers Every Goal Against...
Congresswoman Claims Trump's DOJ Is Harassing ActBlue CEO Because She's a Black Woman
Maine Candidate Hit with NEW Cheating Scandal — Ex Says Platner Knew About...
Here Are More Unhinged Reactions to the Karmelo Anthony Verdict
Newsweek: Karmelo Anthony, Kyle Rittenhouse, and Two Self-Defense Americas
Ms. Rachel Leads Protest Sing-Along Outside Delaney Hall
Jasmine Crockett Doubles Down on Support for Convicted Murderer Karmelo Anthony
CNN Asks Dem Rep and Daughter of Holocaust Survivor If She Backs Platner...
Maine's Teflon Candidate: Scandals Slide Off Platner as Voters Double Down
The Bulwark on Graham Platner’s Many, Many Scandals: BUT TRUMP!
The View's Sunny Hostin Declares Days of Dems Taking the Moral High Ground...

Talk about a s**thole country: Kurt Eichenwald declares America dead of hatred, tax cuts

Where’s the old Kurt Eichenwald? You know, the fun guy next door who’d help his wife look up tentacle porn and get busted doing it? We miss that guy.

Advertisement

We can’t really say that Trump’s broken him, but he sounds … broken. He’s declaring America dead in a Twitter thread Tuesday. Guess we should mark it on a calendar or something.

We hear Canada is lovely.

Advertisement

We’re not sure where Eichenwald is moving to escape this hell, and we’re not sure why people keep crossing the border illegally to come here seeing as it’s so horrible. Why on earth would DREAMers fight to stay here?

Advertisement

We do have to agree that infrastructure could use improvement, especially in Democrat-run cities where a Twitter account keeps track of whether the Metro is on fire or not. Remember when candidate Barack Obama promised a network of high-speed trains, and when Joe Biden joined the push to “go big” on high-speed rail? And now California is already billions over budget for its bullet train, which is still in Phase 1.

We’d be happy to see all of these things improved — if the government would just get out of the way. But that would feed Eichenwald’s theory that the rich would just take the money and jet off to France. Oh well.

We’re also afraid a lot of Eichenwald’s non-troll followers have been reading Cory Booker’s poetry.

No wonder “America first” hits some of these people like an acid attack.

Advertisement

Thanks, rest of the world — but thoughts and prayers are not enough.

https://twitter.com/JkwalkerAuthor/status/955919424015536130

Advertisement

Wow, Trump’s gonna be president forever, isn’t he?

If we knew what to say to give Eichenwald some hope … well, we’re all blocked, so it wouldn’t matter anyway.


Related:

GOP would kill their own moms? Congrats Kurt Eichenwald, this is your dumbest tweet YET

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Recommended

Trending on Twitchy Videos

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement