This day has been filled with all manner of messaging, layered with traditionalism, and infused with countless examples of metaphors, according to the giddy press corps.
But in all of this, you should know what the biggest takeaway of the inauguration was not the transfer of power, the call to bind us together as a united country, nor even how fat Gart Brooks has become — nope.
It was the pyrotechnics! According to Matt Dornic, CNN’s communications director, the fireworks set off after Joe Biden’s swearing-in were — important, we guess.
This team truly understands optics. These images will inspire our friends and shake our foes. pic.twitter.com/8i6qjUiJC5
— Matt Dornic (@mdornic) January 21, 2021
Now look, there have been some really embarrassing examples of the press fawning over the Biden arrival, but gushing over the fireworks display is just plain odd.
You mean your team.
— Anthony Bialy (@AnthonyBialy) January 21, 2021
America's greatest foes: Dogs and birds
— Donny Ferguson (@DonnyFerguson) January 21, 2021
I’m old enough to remember 3 weeks ago when we couldn’t have fireworks for New Years due to COVID. Guess things are all better now…
— Abel James Parsons (@AbelJamesParson) January 21, 2021
Noting the mockery he was receiving Matt attempted to clarify things.
Simplified take. As someone who witnessed this in my hometown, tonight felt hopeful, unifying and patriotic for the first time in a while. pic.twitter.com/ZwlZzfElrn
— Matt Dornic (@mdornic) January 21, 2021
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This does nothing to clear things up. How are fireworks going to ”shake our foes” when last year we saw endless riots where the aggressors used fireworks to attack police and set buildings on fire?
But hey, these fireworks in D.C. must have been a big deal — CNN’s Oliver Darcy was deeply focused upon them!
Well okay, maybe not ”deeply” — he was, as usual, more focused on FoxNews. It turns out the programmers at Fox were not properly enamored over these fireworks. In fact, they actually deemphasized the import of these inspiring fireworks, and Ollie was on the case to call them out.
(We hope you are seated for this breaking news event.)
Yep…he sent that out. Fox – DARED – to cutaway from…fireworks. How they remain on the air another day will be a miracle, once the FCC catches the notice of this crime on the airwaves.
Oliver Darcy is upset with FoxNews for…
– Not broadcasting content to his liking
– Daring to run a commercial
– Cutting away from…a fireworks displayThis is what he has been reduced to the day Trump is gone. pic.twitter.com/9JlBpHCZKS
— Brad Slager – In An Augur Roll (@MartiniShark) January 21, 2021
Oliver Darcy doing the valuable service of informing all of Twitter that Fox has commercial breaks.
— Stephen L. Miller (@redsteeze) January 21, 2021
Why was @oliverdarcy watching Fox and not the spectacular fireworks? Who can we report him to?
— Jason Lovato (@lovatoje) January 21, 2021
Ah, the Darcy Conundrum surfaces — how dare Fox not do something as Ollie is ALSO not doing said thing, due to being occupied with watching Fox, then tweeting about them.
Just understand folks that these were deeply important unifying fireworks tonight. Unlike in 2017, when Donald Trump was NOT praised for his magnificent fireworks display. Instead, he was being accused of having his pyrotechnics spelling out ”USSR”.
Yes, seriously.
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