Earlier today, Facebook was down for a good bit of time so of course, that meant DOGS AND CATS, LIVING TOGETHER MASS HYSTERIA! The world almost literally ended! THE HUMANITY.
Actually, what everyone jokes about every time Facebook crashes is how much more productive and happy we all seem …
We can’t help but wonder if ‘The Onion’ deliberately timed their piece on Facebook’s decline with the outage because man, it was just too perfect.
Researchers Find Decline In Facebook Use Could Be Directly Linked To Desire To Be Happy, Fully Functioning Person https://t.co/0KPXrz89y7 pic.twitter.com/ELhiZ9DHfb
— The Onion (@TheOnion) November 12, 2018
From The Onion:
Researchers at University of California-Berkeley discovered Friday that a reduction in Facebook use could be directly linked to one’s desire to be a happy and fully functioning person. “Our data indicate that there may, in fact, be a relationship between yearning to be a self-realized human who enjoys being with other people in the real world and not spending every waking minute on artificial, once-removed social-interaction venues such as Facebook,” said lead scientist Dr. Charles Jennings, explaining that those who logged even marginally less time on the site displayed greater interest in performing basic physical activities, at least occasionally left their homes, and developed more meaningful relationships with others.
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At least occasionally left their homes … EL OH EL.
Another case of, “Its an Onion article, but dances significantly close to reality.”
— Autumn.Hughes.Fic (@AutumnFic) November 12, 2018
Or THIS . . . pic.twitter.com/64BIQUgch4
— ScoBo (@scizotts) November 12, 2018
See, the timing was SO SPOT ON.
Can confirm: Permanently deleted my account in April, and have experienced increased happiness in months since.
— J. Swigart (@J_Is_For_Jon) November 12, 2018
But if we’re not on Facebook where will we get all of our cat gifs, recipe videos and family angst?
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