Raise your hand if you knew that Anderson Cooper, CNN's chief liberal apologist, had also worked for CBS's 60 Minutes for the past 20 years.
Yeah, we didn't either.
Apparently, however, it's true. We know it must be true because, last night, the disgraced news program gave Cooper more than SEVENTEEN MINUTES to announce that he is quitting the show.
If it takes you seventeen minutes to say goodbye, you are not a journalist; you are a narcissist.
We won't punish our readers by asking you to watch all of his epic farewell. Trust us when we say that he made a few not-so-subtle digs at Bari Weiss for demanding that CBS journalists act like journalists and not DNC publicists. Shame on her!
You may want to watch the final minutes, however, to see the part where Cooper was driven to tears. Conveniently, that is also the part where he is talking exclusively about himself.
In a heartfelt sign-off, Anderson Cooper reflects on the stories, risks, adventures, and human connections that defined his two decades with television's most iconic newsmagazine. https://t.co/bbRt5TYrmd pic.twitter.com/ZTUX0clIil
— 60 Minutes (@60Minutes) May 18, 2026
Aww, that's sweet. He got all weepy when thinking about all the ways he has been able to say his own name.
Unfortunately for Cooper, though, at least one person DID remember that he was a 60 Minutes correspondent.
Kevin Dalton summed up Cooper's career at CNN and CBS -- and demolished his valedictory address -- with one indelible image:
Recommended
You only need one photo to sum up Anderson Cooper’s journalistic career https://t.co/Q8k6lJFaQN pic.twitter.com/1abJXoBvlD
— Kevin Dalton (@TheKevinDalton) May 18, 2026
OOF!
That's gonna leave a mark. Far more of a mark than Cooper's never-ending, rambling eulogy for himself.
It’s all performance art https://t.co/5vM0QyE3CY
— The Heck? (@OhhHeckYeah) May 18, 2026
Except there's nothing very artful about it, particularly when it is all performance in favor of a leftist agenda and not the truth.
Cooper has had other lowlights that helpful users remembered.
Did he ever apologize for calling members of the Tea Party the derogatory term “tea baggers”?
— King Mojo👑🎤 (@Live_KingMojo) May 18, 2026
We're going to assume that was a rhetorical question. Of course, he didn't.
Made himself part of the story Failed journalism 101 but someone must’ve liked him I guess 🤣
— Martin Boltey (@mboltey) May 18, 2026
Always.
A sycophant with severe TDS. He helped make 60 Minutes into the TMZ of broadcast television. Ruined a venerable institution. His legacy is that of Jerry Springer.
— David Barkdull (@DBarkdull) May 18, 2026
Ouch!
Cooper didn't ruin 60 Minutes alone, obviously, but he was a key cast member in its demise. It is hardly 'television's most iconic news magazine' and hasn't been for at least as long as Cooper has been there.
https://t.co/NiU0S8kk9l pic.twitter.com/Rz5SUdHdjs
— jimtreacher.substack.com (@jtLOL) May 18, 2026
— MaryAnnNotGinger 💋 (@MAnotGinger) May 18, 2026
Cooper's most recent 'hard-hitting act of journalism' for 60 Minutes was flying to South Africa to try to deny that white farmers are being killed there.
It goes without saying that the only reason 60 Minutes and Cooper went to South Africa is that President Trump welcomed many of those farmers to America.
That's a pretty lousy legacy.
We got a two-fer this week with him and Colbert! Now they’ll be off to ruin @Substack like their other failed journo buddies have. https://t.co/KVp023jSRY
— LG in AZ (@AzMenagerie) May 18, 2026
Maybe they can host a podcast together! That no one will subscribe to. Sadly, even though he has left CBS, Cooper will continue to remain insufferable and ridiculously biased over at CNN.
Not everyone was happy to see Cooper go, however. We found at least one person who is going to miss him terribly.
I had the privilege of working with @andersoncooper on three stories for @60Minutes. He is a brilliant journalist, with an unparalleled work ethic. But most importantly, he is one of the finest human beings I have ever met. Congratulations Anderson on a remarkable career at 60…
— Michael Avenatti (@MichaelAvenatti) May 18, 2026
HAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
The creepy porn lawyer has got Cooper's back!
Ironically, the very fact that Avenatti worked with Cooper on not one, not two, but THREE stories for 60 Minutes is more of an indictment of the program -- and Cooper's career there -- than anything else we could write.
But after his final farewell last night, we do hope that Anderson Cooper at least remembered to take his Hurricane Katrina waders with him when he walked out the door.
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