Ron DeSantis Announces His Pick to Replace Marco Rubio in the Senate
Adam Schiff Rushes to MSNBC to Save FACE After Getting WORKED By Pam...
TikTok CEO to Share Stage with Tech Giants at Trump Inauguration Amidst Ban...
Martina Navratilova OWNED Over and Over Again in Back and Forth With ALL...
KJP Withheld Gaza Ceasefire and Hostage Release News to Ensure Her Farewell Basked...
Biden Sets the Stage to Take Credit When Trump Cleans Up His Messes
BOOYAH! James Woods Describes the B*tch-SLAPPING Pam Bondi Gave Adam Schiff As Only...
NUKE-IFIED! Dan Bongino Reminds Tim Kaine About Disturbing Allegations in HIS Glass House...
Time to Pay Up, Kid: Scott Presler Calls Out Alyssa Farah Griffin on...
Start Updating Your Resume: Unhinged Lefty in Space Force Gear Promises a Coup...
Scott Jennings: Biden May Be a Terrible President but MAGA Should Be Doubly...
Don Lemon Has Trouble Accepting Trump’s Pivotal Role in Gaza Ceasefire and Hostage...
Farewell Tyrants! Biden Aligns with Harris Against Americans’ Constitutional Speech and Pr...
The Three Possible Reasons MSNBC’s Joe Scarborough Totally Missed Joe Biden’s OBVIOUS Ment...
Dana Perino Buries Biden's 'Farewell Speech' in the Graveyard of Hypocrisy and Gaslighting

CDC issues guidelines for 'safer sex' if you're infected with monkeypox

No, this isn’t The Babylon Bee.

The CDC issued new “safer sex” guidelines for those infected with monkeypox, a “rare disease caused by infection with the monkeypox virus” that causes a “rash that can look like pimples or blisters that appears on the face, inside the mouth, and on other parts of the body, like the hands, feet, chest, genitals, or anus.”

Advertisement

Our health experts at work!

Here are all of the CDC’s recommendations:

How can a person lower their risk during sex?

Talk to your partner about any recent illness and be aware of new or unexplained sores or rashes on your body or your partner’s body, including the genitals and anus. If you or your partner have recently been sick, currently feel sick, or have a new or an unexplained rash or sores, do not have sex and see a healthcare provider. This is always a good plan, even if monkeypox isn’t in your area.

If you or a partner has monkeypox, the best way to protect yourself and others is to not have sex of any kind (oral, anal, vaginal) and not kiss or touch each other’s bodies while you are sick, especially any rash or sores. Do not share things like towels, fetish gear, sex toys, and toothbrushes.

If you or your partner have (or think you might have) monkeypox and you decide to have sex, consider the following to reduce the chance of spreading the virus:

Advertisement
  • Have virtual sex with no in-person contact.

  • Masturbate together at a distance of at least 6 feet, without touching each other and without touching any rash or sores.

  • Consider having sex with your clothes on or covering areas where rash or sores are present, reducing as much skin-to-skin contact as possible.

  • Avoid kissing.

  • Remember to wash your hands, fetish gear, sex toys and any fabrics (bedding, towels, clothing) after having sex

  • Limit your number of partners to avoid opportunities for monkeypox to spread.

Hey, they’re the experts. We shouldn’t trust the science?

Well, we’re mocking the CDC because the CDC deserves to be mocked:

Advertisement

Are people this dumb?

Don’t answer that.

***

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Recommended

Trending on Twitchy Videos