Apparently, there are 5 zebras on the loose in the D.C. suburbs and nobody can catch them

In other news, apparently, there are 5 zebras on the loose in Maryland and have, so far, evaded capture for over a week:

Five zebras have been on the loose in Maryland for over a week https://t.co/CWuNoDKZzZ pic.twitter.com/N9CJ94rcrT

— The Hill (@thehill) September 10, 2021

But police and officials are trying their best to capture them:

5 zebras are on the loose in Maryland after escaping a private farm. Police say they are working to capture them and warned residents not to pet them in case they bite.

DC Rep. Eleanor Holmes Norton issued a statement denying involvement in their escape: "My alibi is solid." pic.twitter.com/WGq7rxdL14

— AJ+ (@ajplus) September 10, 2021

One odd note on all this, Rep. Elanor Holmes Norton wants everyone to know that she didn’t release the zebras:

I’ve been following the news of the zebras on the run in DC suburbs. Local news has reported that the zebras were let loose on Saturday or Sunday of last weekend, a period of time during which I was enjoying quiet time at home with family.

— Eleanor #DCStatehood Holmes Norton (@EleanorNorton) September 10, 2021

“My alibi is solid,” she said:

My alibi is solid, but given my career of fighting for statehood for the District, explaining the importance of having consent of the governed, and my recent opposition to fences, I can understand why the charge was made.

— Eleanor #DCStatehood Holmes Norton (@EleanorNorton) September 10, 2021

And her office even put out a statement on it:

I hope the owners find the zebras safely and that all involved live long, full lives.

Statement: https://t.co/JZRD4K9a5T

— Eleanor #DCStatehood Holmes Norton (@EleanorNorton) September 10, 2021

Um, this makes us think she totally released the zebras:

this just makes me think Eleanor did it

— Jessica O’Donnell (@heckyessica) September 10, 2021

Right?

exactly what someone who let six zebras loose from the zoo would say https://t.co/rC0Dzkp4kf

— Siraj Hashmi (@SirajAHashmi) September 10, 2021

Anyway, the zebras should be allowed to roam freely in the D.C. suburbs. “They’ve earned their stripes,” tweeted former FCC head Ajit Pai:

Let them go! They've earned their stripes. https://t.co/4pHi7Yp2A7

— Ajit Pai (@AjitPai) September 10, 2021

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