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Faster, Higher, ... Hotter? Paris Olympics Denies Athletes Air Conditioning Due to 'Climate Change'

Meme Screenshot

Great news, world-class athletes. The Paris Olympics has added a new event for this summer's games. 

Heat stroke.

Yes, in an effort to further bend the knee to whiny teenager Greta Thunberg, the Paris Olympics declared that no athletes will have access to air-conditioning in an effort to make this year's games the 'most sustainable Olympics ever.'

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Quick reminder: The Paris Olympics will take place from July 26 - August 11. 

Second reminder: Last summer, when all of Europe was hit by a heat wave, more than 5,000 people died from the heat in France when temperatures often exceeded 100 degrees. 

Oh. 

Fox News has more details about France's ingenious plan:

'We designed these buildings so that they would be comfortable places to live in in the summer, in 2024 and later on, and we don't need air conditioning in these buildings because we oriented the facades so that they wouldn't get too much sun during the summer, and the facades, the insulation is really efficient,' [Olympics infrastructure head Jann] Krysinski told Reuters.

The decision is part of the organizing committee’s goal to cut the carbon footprint of the Paris Games by half and stage the most sustainable Olympics to date by installing a special technology to use natural sources to keep everyone cool even during a potential heat wave.

Well, that's great news, athletes. You won't be hot because they designed the facades to be ... insulated?

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Paris also plans on using a water system that will cool ... the floors. 

Are the people at the Olympics familiar with how heat works? 

No, they're just virtue signaling. 

More than 10,500 athletes from over 200 countries will fly into Paris for the Olympics, not to mention all the fans. Or the government officials, who will all almost certainly use private jets. 

But sure. Turning off the AC is going to save the planet. 

Or something. 

Like most things leftist, their words don't actually mean anything (or they mean the opposite). There is no 'progress' associated with people who call themselves 'progressives.'

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LOL. We haven't heard anything about rationing water and showers for the athletes but it would not surprise us in the least. 

Somehow, we get the feeling that the athletes were not consulted at all about this decision. 

In fairness, The Onion isn't even The Onion anymore. They're fully woke. But this does seem like a Babylon Bee headline. 

This is actually the funniest punchline to this story. According to Fox News, both the Australian and Greek Olympic committees (two countries familiar with heat) have already announced that they will be spending hundreds of thousands of dollars to equip their athletes with portable air conditioners for the duration of the Olympics. We anticipate many more countries will follow suit. 

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But we're betting those portable units are WAY more efficient than a central air-conditioning system, right? 

Oh, well. It all makes perfect sense when you realize we live in Clown WorldTM.

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