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Woman Claims MAGA Woke the Beast, Promises Woke 2.0

Conservatives have been accused of stealing the word "woke" from the black community, where it was a positive thing to be. That's fine with me — "woke" as a slur is great. DEI is woke. Critical race theory is woke. Academic queer theory is woke. Drag Queen Story Hour is woke. I'd be fine if everything were to disappear.

But watch out … this woman is threatening to unleash "Woke 2.0." "You done went and woke the BEAST," she claims.

That's nice and all, but the 2024 election sort of castrated the whole woke movement, so we have no idea what Woke 2.0 promises.

I'm quaking with fear, as I'm sure you are too.

And the goofy glasses.

It is! So what is this beast that we've supposedly awakened? I need to know more so I can prepare. Is it paid protesters at a Tesla dealership? Is it Rep. Pramila Jayapal's super-popular "resistance labs" teaching people how to be "strike-ready and street-ready" against Donald Trump's dictatorship? I wonder how much the beast depended on USAID for food.

How much more woke are these crazies going to get?

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