As Twitchy reported last week, production company A24 released the trailer for its upcoming movie, "Civil War." Some screenwriter saw all the rhetoric about a civil war on X and decided to make a screenplay out of it. If you missed the trailer, here it is again:
The first trailer for Alex Garland’s ‘CIVIL WAR’, starring Kirsten Dunst, Cailee Spaeny and Jesse Plemons.
— DiscussingFilm (@DiscussingFilm) December 13, 2023
In theaters on April 26. pic.twitter.com/FLNXvVW7zU
A lot of people thought it was inconceivable that California and Texas would join up to form the "Western Forces." A new map, however, clears that up. California and Texas are their own republics, while Oregon and Washington have teamed up with Idado to form the "Western Forces." Then there is the "Florida Alliance" and the "Loyalist States." We'll assume the loyalist states are the good guys.
You obviously want to live in the Florida Alliance. pic.twitter.com/3EGQ6cpqkK
— Bizlet (@bizlet7) December 18, 2023
What is the cultural or political logic behind this map? https://t.co/13kkv8BPnM
— Peter Wrangel (@PeterWrangel) December 18, 2023
None but I still want to know how you let SC fall to the loyalists
— American Lictor (@AmericanLictor) December 18, 2023
There is none. States like Missouri, Nebraska, Kentucky, South Carolina in the “loyalist” corner?
— Josey Wales’ Burner (@rainyday151) December 18, 2023
"I want to make an edgy movie that shows I've never visited any of these places."
— miglet35 (@miglet35) December 18, 2023
This is what happens when screenwriters pretend to be tacticians.
— Grassy McGrassface (RealName™) (@likethegrass) December 18, 2023
That is not how it would go.
— thom-bradshaw (@thom_bradshaw) December 18, 2023
Plenty of those “loyalist” states would NOT be loyal. Like Missouri lmfao that state government hates the feds😂
— Ranger (@KhuzestanSultan) December 18, 2023
South Carolina has an amazing history of not seceding or rebelling totally agree they would be “loyalists”….Wait…
— Tjord Fergesen 🇺🇸 (@JankyMcstevens) December 18, 2023
People always shove Pennsylvania into coastal progressive New England or mid Atlantic territories on these maps but the truth is PA is a big state and except for Philly and Pittsburgh, it isn’t even remotely left wing.
— Plutarch’s Stepson (@PlutarchStepson) December 18, 2023
First of all: california would not be a republic. It'd be a communist state.
— The Harsh Truth (@HarshTruthUSA) December 18, 2023
The idea that the “loyalist states” could maintain that flanked corridor is hopium. Colorado would be the loyalist Alamo.
— Mediocregoon (@mediocregoon) December 18, 2023
Florida Alliance does make the most sense out of these. But not sure in any scenario the country would have loyalist states across the middle.
— Garak (@cya9nide) December 18, 2023
I'm suspicious of any map like this that covers entire states as being aligned, rather than massive swathes of rural territory opposing an archipelago.
— Rider of Skrodes (@ChristFren) December 18, 2023
Someone didn’t think too hard about this map, considering they book Virginia, the Carolinas, and the Midwest in the loyalist camp and Oregon and Washington somehow didn’t join California.
— JDK (@itsjustJDK) December 18, 2023
There isn’t one. They just picked CA and TX to give the feigned appearance of not taking sides. They’re going to pretend it’s apolitical to try to get butts in seats but it’s Hollywood so you know what it’s going to be. Sniper in the trailer has green hair and pink/teal nails.
— Andrew Kuper (@super_kuper) December 18, 2023
That map is laughable. In any real modern Civil War in the US the idea of geographic integrity of the states would be the first thing to go. But even pretending that fever dream was plausible, explain to me what Montana has in common with the Willamette Valley of Oregon.
— Jimmy Vanndale 🌻 (@quietgoesthedon) December 18, 2023
I think they're just carefully threading the needle and trying to disconnect their movie from current year politics so the logic is mainly avoiding making insinuations
— Accelerator (@Turbofast111) December 18, 2023
Back in 2020, Amy Siskind posted a map of the United States of Canada and Jesusland. Even that would make more sense.
We don't know who the president is in the trailer, but Joe Biden has assured us you'd need F-15s and maybe a nuke if you thought you could overthrow the government — your AR-15s don't stand a chance. So the loyalist states win.
***
Join the conversation as a VIP Member