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WHO fights the disease of bigotry by renaming monkeypox to something less 'racist and stigmatizing'

Remember monkeypox? For a little while there, it was the Next Big Disease. It managed to dethrone COVID, albeit temporarily, as the virus that everyone should be terrified of.

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So, whatever happened to monkeypox? Well, it ultimately made its way back out of the public’s consciousness, in part, at least, because of woke liberals being very, very upset about people who pointed out that monkeypox seemed to chiefly be a disease afflicting the gay male community in places like San Francisco. Apparently gay (and bisexual) men who frequented sex parties and engaged in other kinds of risky sexual behavior were considered to be at high risk of contracting monkeypox. Who knew?

Anyway, we’d forgotten about monkeypox for a time, especially since winter is around the corner and The Experts™ are sounding the alarm about COVID once again. But the pox are back in the news again, thanks to a bold move by the World Health Organization to fight the bigoted stigma surrounding the virus. No, we’re not talking about homophobia. We’re talking about … racism.

That’s right, folks. According to the World Health Organization, “monkeypox” is hella racist:

More from the AP:

The U.N. health agency said in a statement Monday that mpox was its new preferred name for monkeypox, saying that both monkeypox and mpox would be used for the next year while the old name is phased out.

WHO said it was concerned by the “racist and stigmatizing language” that arose after monkeypox spread to more than 100 countries. It said numerous individuals and countries asked the organization “to propose a way forward to change the name.”

In August, WHO began consulting experts about renaming the disease, shortly after the U.N. agency declared monkeypox’s spread to be a global emergency.

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What a comfort it is to know that the World Health Organization has got their priorities in order. Renaming diseases whose names aren’t even racist is definitely the best use of their time and money. Or, should we say, our money. The U.S. is still helping to fund these stupid idiots. Because apparently it’s important to make sure that a bunch of people who aren’t actually doing the job they’re there to do have ample financial resources to not do the job they’re there to do.

We’re not sure we actually want to know the answer to that question. If we found out, we might seriously start throwing things.

Yeah, why are chicken pox still called “chicken pox”? Isn’t naming them after chickens an insult to the world’s coward community?

Was there a public outcry from the global monkey community and we just missed it? We certainly can’t remember anything like that, but then, we’ve been pretty busy focusing on stuff that actually matters, so …

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Yeah, sorry, but this is just plain stupid.

Hmmm. Could it be that — and we’re just spitballing here, of course — it’s the World Health Organization who has the racism problem? If their first thought when they hear or see the word “monkey” is that other people might hear or see the word “monkey” and think something racist, maybe it’s the World Health Organization who has the racism problem.

They really are. They just can’t help it.

You know what? If the World Health Organization is really that concerned about the racism inherent in the word “monkey,” perhaps they could pay reparations to the victims by allowing actual monkeys to take over the entire operation. That way, they can prove to the world that monkeys are just as smart and just as capable of doing their job. Maybe even smarter and more capable of doing their job.

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And the rest of us get to go on with our lives.

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