America really needs some help putting this whole Jeffrey-Toobin-masturbating-on-a-Zoom-call thing into perspective.

Enter Toronto Star entertainment columnist Vinay Menon to do just that:

OK, so first of all:

It is not regrettable.

What is regrettable is that Vinay Menon came up with this take and that the Toronto Star thought it was worth sharing with the world:

But we need to keep perspective. We need to see the big picture. Granted, there are few things more unprofessional than masturbating during a company meeting. Toobin is a lawyer. His judgment is now suspect. I get it. All I’m saying is we need to forget this ever happened. Block it out.

Toobin may not grasp streaming technology. He may well be cursed with the hormones of a randy teenager. But he also has one of the sharpest legal minds on the continent. He cuts through the noise. He brings deep context to shallow airwaves. As a writer and broadcaster, he is everything we need, now more than ever: smart, thoughtful, insightful, incisive and knowledgeable.

He made an embarrassingly stupid mistake.

Let’s leave it at that and get on with saving America.

Or — hear us out — let’s not.

Or harass his CNN colleagues or offer to give his pregnant mistress hush money so she can abort his love child.

Now might be a really good time for Vinay to wake up and smell the Tim Horton’s. Jeffrey Toobin is not an upstanding guy. Not in the good sense, anyway.

Yeah we are.