Jacob Wohl, who has somehow managed to avoid prison, isn’t about to sit idly by and watch his sterling reputation take yet another hit. That’s why he’s announced a joint press conference with his esteemed colleague Jack Burkman to clear up any misconceptions following getting busted for trying to take down Democratic POTUS hopeful Pete Buttigieg with a fake sexual assault accusation:

So much to unpack.

Well, when you play eleventy-dimensional chess like Jacob Wohl does, time just becomes meaningless.

Get excited, everybody.

Neither can we. But people will go.

Oh, probably. Honestly, the only thing that would make this press conference worth watching or covering is if Wohl and Burkman finally got what’s been coming to them for so long.

Hopefully Burkman will remember to zip up his fly this time. It’s important to maintain an air of professionalism.