Dorkiest Assassin EVER: WHCD Shooter Takes Cringe Mirror Selfie, Gears Up Like John Wick Before Epic Fall

Federal prosecutors just dropped new information about the WHCD shooter including a selfie he took in the hotel mirror before he tried to storm the ballroom.

Also, he literally was caught because he tripped. Yes, really.

JUST IN: Federal prosecutors release new images and details of Cole Allen and his alleged attempt to assassinate president Trump. Here is a mirror selfie he took about 30 minutes before charging past the magnetometers. https://t.co/SjBVCPQJQO pic.twitter.com/tBPnPDOQPS
— Kyle Cheney (@kyledcheney) April 29, 2026

Maybe he dressed in all black so he would blend in as an AV worker on site. They often dress in all black.

NOTABLE: Prosecutors' memo drops any reference to a USSS officer being hit by a bullet. It now says an officer observed Allen fire in the direction of the staircase toward the WHCD. That officer then fired at Allen five times but did not hit him. https://t.co/SjBVCPQJQO pic.twitter.com/HeqOQ4V61a
— Kyle Cheney (@kyledcheney) April 29, 2026

It's a bit concerning the Secret Service fired multiple shots and could not hit this man. Maybe they need some more range time.

Notes Allen kept on his phone while he crossed the country by train, per prosecutors. https://t.co/SjBVCPQJQO pic.twitter.com/xdiT4UsbDs
— Kyle Cheney (@kyledcheney) April 29, 2026

Imagine people still saying Trump staged this 🫠 https://t.co/ZWWtDndymD
— Gina Milan (@ginamilan_) April 29, 2026

Oh, they will because Democrats are crazy.

"what appears to be a red necktie, tucked into his pants"

this is the funniest assassination attempt of all time https://t.co/9upLkIvIMq
— PoIiMath (@politicalmath) April 29, 2026

Ok, but who the hell was he taking a selfie for?!

He hid his plan from everyone he knew and thought he was about to die, so it wasn’t like he was going to post it to Insta afterwards.

This is terminal levels of brain rot behavior from your child’s teacher. Think on that. https://t.co/a0gZnchgru
— Neurotic Quixotic—One Love and Four Lights (@jabelincoln) April 29, 2026

He thought this would be the picture dumb Democrats used on their tribute t-shirts to him after he killed the President, probably.

Imagine just serving up all the evidence necessary for you to do life in prison after getting tackled and thoroughly embarrassing yourself as the most inept would-be assassin ever. https://t.co/7ngSrqz7Jk pic.twitter.com/oi0lXPUnBF
— Smells Like Teen Statism (@BlueEightySix) April 29, 2026

Thankfully he was this inept. Since Secret Service can't seem to hit the side of a barn, it could have been much worse.

They are calling him the most reddit tier political assassin of all time. 10-1 he has a fedora somewhere in that room. https://t.co/gThRZPO1Wp pic.twitter.com/FbZLAsKZkp
— Paul (@WomanDefiner) April 29, 2026

I am glad he was captured alive so he has to endure the embarrassment with us. https://t.co/HQpo8cbl5f
— sneakn (@sneaknsneak) April 29, 2026

Calling it now, we’re looking at the dorkiest would-be assassin in history. The manifesto, black dress shirt, a bunch of weird mall ninja knives for some reason, making that face in a selfie … it’s all so humiliating https://t.co/oKNBNpan6G
— Josh Billinson (@jbillinson) April 29, 2026

It's a blessing Leftists are so inept.

Editor's Note: The Democrat Party has never been less popular as voters reject its globalist agenda.

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