DHS Announces That 19-Year-Old High School Serial Groper Has Been Deported
Yesterday’s Call, Tomorrow’s Anniversary
'A Gentle and Generous Soul': X Pays Tribute to Andrew Wimsatt
Bill Kristol: We Should Be Appalled Trump Is Trying to Impose the Anti-American...
Libs of TikTok Exposes Universities Celebrating the First ‘Kirkaversary’
Psaki Panics Over Fetterman Switch Talk — Maybe Democrats Should Have Behaved Better
Lindsay Clancy Juror Said It Was 'Disgusting' That Lone Holdout Re-Enacted Stranglings
Abdul El-Sayed Called American Prisons Racist and a Weapon. Michigan May Make Him...
Hillary Clinton Suggests Netanyahu Allowed October 7 to Happen So He Could ‘Come...
James Talarico Tells NBC News He ‘Missed the Mark’ When Speaking About Dismantling...
Janice Dean Self-Awareness Nukes Hillary Clinton and What Made Her Furious About the...
FTC Chair Andrew Ferguson WRECKS the Washington Post for Blatant Hit Job on...
Trump Ignites GOP Fire In Texas, Democrats About To Find Out
Nick Shirley Spotlights the Record Gavin Newsom Has to Overcome As His Presidential...
Dancing on Charlie Kirk’s Grave: Hanania’s Anniversary Hit Job and Ahmari’s Endorsement Sp...

ICE Agent's Internal Bleeding Proves Refrigerator Doors Are NOT, in Fact, Deadlier Than SUVs

AP Photo/Rick Bowmer, File

Now, we here at 'Twitchy' are not medical doctors (we're just hilarious and definitely should have Doctorates in snark), but when we hear a person has internal bleeding after being hit by a whole SUV, it sounds pretty serious.

Advertisement

Wait?! That can't be right. Mayor Jacob Frey told America his injuries were akin to 'closing a refrigerator door with your hip'. People generally don't experience internal bleeding when they go to get a little sweet treat, Jacob!

Sounds like he owes the ICE officer an apology.

Did the ICE officer spontaneously combust?

Advertisement

Which is strange since the Left is always whining about SUV and big trucks as dangerous to pedestrians. Now, suddenly they are like little cotton candy balls. 

Of course, the Left went right to work insisting he really isn't bleeding and everyone is lying to news reporters. 

Then, the even more demented theory he purposely stepped in front of the SUV so she had to hit him and then he could shoot her. Whatever, dude!

Advertisement

Lock down all refrigerator doors until we have a better idea what they are capable of.

It's impossible to reason with crazy people.

Those are the only facts that matter.

Editor’s Note: Every single day, here at Twitchy, we will stand up and FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT against the radical left and deliver the conservative reporting our readers deserve.

Help us continue to tell the truth about the Trump administration and its successes. Join Twitchy VIP and use promo code FIGHT to get 60% off your membership.

Join the conversation as a VIP Member

Recommended

Trending on Twitchy Videos

Advertisement
Advertisement
Advertisement