'Peak pathetic'! Rolling Stone finds treatment for post-election depression (Hint: BEYOND parody)

We’re not sure what stage of post-election grief this article from Rolling Stone signifies, but it’s got to be a fairly high number:

A lot of people have been struggling to cope with life under President Trump – but for some, cuddling is the answer https://t.co/1IKo0WUsT1 pic.twitter.com/sbatr2RYlz

— Rolling Stone (@RollingStone) August 4, 2017

Can it get any more pitiful? Yep!

People are paying $80 to cuddle because Trump

um https://t.co/ae7YLsuRNz pic.twitter.com/cuI6AehKBB

— Shoshana Weissmann, Sloth Committee Chair ? (@senatorshoshana) August 4, 2017

Alternate headline: Resistance snowflakes inadvertently prove that Trump’s good for business. But still, it’s pretty sad:

https://twitter.com/JustEric/status/893551137961385984
https://twitter.com/TarheelKrystle/status/893550780396912641

What a difference a couple of generations make. pic.twitter.com/oi26CmeEow

— Stewart Hanson (@Jaystew17) August 4, 2017

We have reached peak pathetic. https://t.co/KdcqkuN57F

— Tawnos, Existing Robot (@TawnosWins) August 4, 2017

This will lead to more babies and additional climate destruction. RESIST THE CUDDLING! https://t.co/FYKOfkvWku

— Federalist Musket?? (@Patriot_Musket) August 4, 2017

Quality journalism there guys. Way to stay relevant.

— Rufus (@Runjinrun) August 4, 2017

He's going to win again, isn't he?https://t.co/AAYo0BSMFq

— Alex Griswold (@HashtagGriswold) August 4, 2017

They’re working on it!