Finally, some good news from Rolling Stone. It seems that in a slide presentation given to Portland police, someone inserted a copy of the “Prayer of the Alt-Knight.” The image shows a policeman in riot gear beating up a dirty hippie.

We hadn’t seen the “Prayer of the Alt-Knight,” but it’s pretty good:

And the Lord said…

Woe be unto you, dirty hippy;
For thou stinketh of patchouli and BO;
For thou talk of Marx, yet know him not;
For thou has bills, yet have not paid;
For thou has dreadlocks and white skin.

And so I shall send among you,
My humble servants with hat, and with bat;
That they may christen your heads with hickory,
An anoint your faces with pepper spray.

And once thou hast been cuffed and stuffed;
Once thou has been stitched and bandaged;
Perhaps thou shall learn,
I am tired of your shit.


We didn’t see any outrage, but Rolling Stone was probably happy for the clicks.


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