Apparently, the #MyBernieStory hashtag is a thing and we suspect it’s meant to make you feel sympathy for these Bernie Sanders supporters who are stuck under mountains of student debt. In short, if you don’t vote for Sanders in 2020, David here doesn’t get to have kids.

First of all … never post a picture of yourself on the Internet holding a sign; that’s why Photoshop was invented. Second, if your true goal is to pay off the student loans you took out, don’t start your Twitter bio with “activist” and include that you’re “in solidarity with oppressed people around the world.” Those oppressed people truly are oppressed and don’t give a damn about your student loan payments.

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