The White House is looking for tales of tragedy from the four-day-long government shutdown. The avalanche of media attention given to Obamacare poster boy “Lying” Chad Henderson would suggest that, yes, works of fiction are acceptable, and perhaps even preferred. In any case, bring the pain. Here are your instructions as they appear on the White House website.
Ironically, a banner on the same webpage notes that, due to the shutdown, “some submissions may not be processed.” There’s your first sob story right there!
The lapdog media isn’t affected by the shutdown and is hard at work digging up its own stories. One woman was driven to tears after three days without Head Start.
“I was bawling on Interstate 10,” a Head Start mom said. “I feel so bad for [my son].” http://t.co/CZFgZHhNgF
— Sam Stein (@samstein) October 4, 2013
As Ashe Schow of the Washington Examiner observed, “while hundreds of thousands of Americans are furloughed for being ‘non-essential,’ the White House has found asking for their stories to be ‘essential.'” Fortunately, a #ShutdownSobStories hashtag has popped up to make these tragic tales easy to find. Check them out, if your heart can take it.
sweet, #shutdownsobstories is a thing!
— Ashe Schow (@AsheSchow) October 4, 2013
https://twitter.com/Shawn_Z_/status/386214106442645504
#shutdownsobstories I have no idea when to drink water or when to move
— Ute Bell (@utebell) October 4, 2013
https://twitter.com/warmingtozero/status/386216404178853888
#ShutdownSobStories Wildlife in closed National parks are starving due to the lack of picnics.
— Tango Foxtrot (@TFinn82) October 4, 2013
Recommended
#ShutDownSobStories Just who is gonna pick up all these dead bodies on my street?
— RED STATE (@RedState4U) October 4, 2013
It has been a rough week.
https://twitter.com/TheMorningSpew/status/386228230346141696
https://twitter.com/hollyR_J/status/386231364258775040
It snowed today and I had to shovel it. #shutdownsobstories
— Jason B. Whitman, OD (@JasonBWhitman) October 4, 2013
#ShutDownSobStories Obama has to hold his own umbrella. #OrParasol
— Razor (@hale_razor) October 4, 2013
#ShutdownSobStories the White House will only host 2 concerts per month
— Frodo RinosBane ن (@FrodoRinosBane) October 4, 2013
#shutdownsobstories Moochelle couldn't get dressed today, the 24 who help her dress are on furlough
— M Ranieri Huseman (@momoishere) October 4, 2013
https://twitter.com/Obama_Ointment/status/386250118930137088
https://twitter.com/z12z21/status/386253584737632256
https://twitter.com/OneTonTurtle/status/386241193241108480
I broke a nail pretty bad #shutdownsobstories
— Ashe Schow (@AsheSchow) October 4, 2013
https://twitter.com/Shawn_Z_/status/386213071766560768
#ShutdownSobStories White House golf schedule has been – never mind
— Frodo RinosBane ن (@FrodoRinosBane) October 4, 2013
#ShutDownSobStories No $$ for National Christmas Tree – will be confiscating Charlie Brown's POS.
— Collin Lyon ???? (@Collin_Lyon) October 4, 2013
WWII vets now need to travel with wire cutters. #shutdownsobstories
— Greg F. #LibertyOrDeath #WuhanVirus ?only (@straytski) October 4, 2013
#ShutDownSobStories Michelle hasn't had a vacation for 3days
— Catholic Church (@Stratsarefine) October 4, 2013
#ShutDownSobStories Kybosh on anymore IRS Star Trek videos.
— Joseph Bradley (@theboyjoseph) October 4, 2013
#ShutDownSobStories Entire drone program replaced with angry 4th grader with an RC helicopter.
— Collin Lyon ???? (@Collin_Lyon) October 4, 2013
Out of tissues from reading all these touching stories. #shutdownsobstories
— Greg F. #LibertyOrDeath #WuhanVirus ?only (@straytski) October 4, 2013
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