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Trump-indicting D.A. Bragg faceplants in federal court

Okay, we’re going to have to catch you up on a few events, to get to the funny, faceplanting part. But we promise this is going to be hilarious and totally worth it.

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A bit back, Rep. Jim Jordan (Chairman of the House Judiciary Committee) sent a subpoena, to investigate whether New York District Attorney Alvin Bragg had a political agenda in indicting Trump. Crazy, right?

The subpoena was to Mark Pomerantz. Pomerantz had previously worked in Bragg’s office as a Special Assistant District Attorney and reportedly quit in protest when he thought Bragg wouldn’t indict Trump. As just an educated guess, Jordan probably thinks that Bragg has given Pomerantz a window into his thinking which might support the claim that this is a politically-motivated prosecution. So now the committee has subpoenaed Pomerantz to give sworn testimony to them.

That led Bragg to sue Jordan, the House Judiciary Committee, and (for procedural reasons) Pomerantz himself to stop the subpoena, claiming in the lawsuit that it is an ‘unprecedently brazen and unconstitutional attack by members of Congress on an ongoing New York State criminal prosecution and investigation of former President Donald J. Trump.’ We are surprised he didn’t write it in ALL CAPS with lots of exclamation points.

And one of the things that Bragg requested was a temporary restraining order stopping the subpoena (that’s basically an injunction, typically issued without the other side having a chance to respond). The motion for that restraining order was filed Tuesday, April 11:

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It’s not clear what time that motion was filed, but by 2:00 p.m. the day it was filed, Judge Mary Kay Vyskocil had already rejected the motion:

And the reason why she rejected it so quickly is where it starts to get funny:

If you don’t feel like blowing up the text of the order, it says ‘[t]he moving papers reference a Declaration of Theodore J. Boutrous, Jr., but the Court has not been provided with this document yet, nor is it on the docket. The Court also has not been provided with a copy of the subpoena purportedly served on Mr. Pomerantz.’

In other words, they were supposed to attach a couple of documents, including the subpoena itself, and didn’t.

In the legal profession, what this judge did is called a bench-slap.

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Yes, very.

Anecdotally speaking, it kind of goes without saying.

Okay, that’s pretty funny …

Now, to be fair to Bragg, he farmed out this lawsuit to other lawyers—including outside counsel and one lawyer from his office. One can only speculate how closely Bragg is likely to have paid attention to the filings, in this case, bearing his name and related to easily the biggest case of his life.

And frankly, New Yorkers should demand to find out how much these outside attorneys charged to file this waste-of-time motion for a temporary restraining order (it was never going to be granted, even if it was filed correctly), and demand a refund.

Of course, this didn’t stop the usual suspects from leaping to the Bragg team’s defense:

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According to Wikipedia, he is a lawyer …

‘Expertly done.’

And someone kind of missed the point of the judge’s two-page opinion:

But someone was there to explain it to her…

Sadly, the attacks on this pretty pedestrian ruling went on:

Yes, it’s very disturbing how the court is asking the Plaintiff to actually provide the evidence to support his motion.

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That … isn’t how it works. The DOJ can’t just remove a judge.

In any case, there will be a hearing on a motion for a preliminary injunction (an emergency motion for an injunction that will give both sides an opportunity to respond) on April 19. According to reports, that is the day before the deposition, so… stay tuned.

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