Boom? Achieved! As Twitchy reported, Nancy Pelosi upped her usual absurdity by claiming that the cupboard is totally bare so nothing can be cut. Sarah Palin gave her the business as only she can.

Now citizens are basking in the shutdown schadenfreude. Nothing to cut, Pelosi? Oh, really?

Snicker.

Seriously.

Some suggestions for more cutting:

Heh.

And an exit question for the win:

Related:

Sarah Palin schools absurd Nancy Pelosi with awesome nursery rhyme snark

Shutdown bender? Boozed up lawmakers reportedly hit the House floor again

Shutdown theater: Dems, Piers Morgan melt down over Statue of Liberty

Fashion statement: Pelosi sports costly Hermes scarf for shutdown debate

Office of Management and Budget issues official shutdown memo

  • lesterwink23

    Isn’t bureaucracy just wonderful?

    • Zane Henry

      Has anyone else noticed that our downvote troll must not have been an essential government employee? Admittedly, I haven’t been on the site all that much today, so I’m only going by the 4 or 5 articles I’ve read.

  • JeffWRidge

    I wonder how long it will take for Obama’s dog to start flying coach?

    • BlahBlah

      There are now 2 dogs. That is 2 separate planes.

      • Scorpion

        That’s in addition to Michelle’s private squadron.

        • ecosse

          so, three dogs then.

          • Scorpion

            Including the dog pound with included airborne re-fueling tankers. LOL

  • WisconsinPatriot

    Boozed up and non-essential is no way to go through life son……

  • grais

    800,000 was the number from the last shutdown, too.

  • no_more_deceit

    Only 800,000? Kind of like the non-existent twitter followers that are following the president

  • peteee363

    800,000 is that one branch, one department, or the whole thing? and if we have that many un-needed workers, can you imagine how much office space would enter the private market? and if they are invested in globalwhatchamacallit, wouldn’t cutting those 800 grand also save buku carbon emissions for lighting and a/c for thier offices?
    cut ’em loose, and save all that green!

    • Scorpion

      One has to wonder about government workers. What is their average absentee (actually showing up) rate on any given day? Out of 800,00, oh boy.

  • Republicanvet

    Not to make everyone feel worse, but keep in mind, those 800,000 non-essential logs will likely have their furlough days paid days off.
    It happened before. Government shut down and those who stayed home were paid anyway.

    • LisaG

      I did hear that the furlough isn’t going to hurt the workers. They are more than likely to be reimbursed for their days off work. If they were smart people, they prepared for this, and their next paycheck will be like a windfall. If over soon, it will be right before Christmas, and the government will proceed to take credit for helping all those retailers have a great sales season.

      • kindamara

        Then when they go back to “work” in order to catch up they will have to work paid overtime. Not such a bad deal!

        • autdrew4real

          On that, I can disagree. When I worked for the feds, they refused to pay your overtime even if you were so far behind it would take you a month to catch up Thats why we have backlogs. When your clock says your day is done, thats it.
          We used to get something called comp time if they really HAD to have you there. It was hour for hour time added to your vacation/sick hours. It had its own column and if you had to leave early for a sick child, you could ask them to take it from your comp time instead of your sick leave hours. It was useful sometimes but it would have been nice to have that overtime pay.
          I worked for the Defense Commissary Agency during the last shut down. I was “essential” until a year later when they got rid of my job & moved me to the Naval Aviation Depot.

          • Friode28

            Government employees, b..ch if they got hung with a new rope. Comp time is their standard, budgets you know, if you needed more you should have sold your talents in the private sector.

          • autdrew4real

            I don’t work for them and haven’t since 1997 when I became my children’s mother.
            Comp time was not given at my first job & it was new to me at that time. I’m sure there are many who hadn’t heard of it & that is why I commented. Not bit (#! ng, just sharing info
            I worked in accounting at one job & budget in another. That doesn’t mean i was privy to every line item or even those of my office. I was a lowly office poge.

          • Friode28

            Thank you for keeping kids out of the Nanny State Care system. If you haven’t learned by now, no one wants to pay extra, those who will tell you about it. Those with schemes like comp time say it under their breath and don’t want to explain it.

          • LisaG

            Thank you, I appreciate your explanation.

    • walterc

      Aren’t these people entitled to unemployment like the rest of us? Or does the federal gov’t exempt itself from unemployment insurance since it never lays anyone off?

      I think the biggest fear the administration and congress have about this shut down is that we’ll figure out how much is not needed. Like we did with the sequester. “The world will end as we know it if sequester goes into effect.” Then the government keeps running, Money saved. And while these 800k workers are not being paid, we are putting off reaching the debt limit a few hours.

      Still not seeing a down side here.

      • Republicanvet

        I would believe they are eligible. I have zero experience with unemployment, so I don’t know if they have to be out so many days before being eligible.

        • walterc

          They only have to work less than a set number of hours per week (I think it’s 30 here in Wyoming). Since this is Tuesday, they should qualify. But in order for the employees to qualify, the employer has to contribute to the fund. And I’m betting the federal government is exempt. Since they never lay anyone off.

  • Right Wired ✓ᵛᵉʳᶦᶠᶦᵉᵈ

    Any ‘business’ that can’t cut 10% of its workforce at a moment’s notice is bloated and inefficient.

    So that means our government is the most bloated and inefficient thing to exist, ever in the history of humanity.

    I hope the shutdown continues till next October.

  • Marvin Nelson

    Add Boehner, McCain, and McConnell to the “non-essential list” please!

    • Clete Torres ✓ᵈⁱˢᵍʳᵒⁿⁱᶠⁱᵉᵈ

      Ryan and Rubio can go as well.

    • ObamaFail

      Every Democrat should go as well.

  • Joe

    The cupboard IS bare if the cupboard is Pelosi’s head.

  • john1v6

    “Essential”/”non-essential” doesn’t quite mean what it sounds like. “Essential” jobs have to be done 24/7 no matter what; “non-essential” can miss a day or six w/o the world ending.

    I’m in the Air Force; here’s an example for us. Security Forces manning the gates are essential; we can’t leave the base unprotected. Acquisition officers reviewing missile design proposals are non-essential; it’s a necessary job, but not one that can’t happen a day or a week late.

    I’m not saying the gov’t doesn’t have unnecessary employees. We probably have thousands of them. But “non-essential” isn’t the same as “unnecessary”

    • Taco Boutit

      I have a per diem nurse who comes to my house twice a month to administer an infusion. Her other job is 3rd shift at the VA Hospital. They have 4 nurses on her floor for the overnight shift. As of yesterday, there is funding for a week of nursing care at their current level. Sure, they can *probably* manage with 2 nurses on staff, but at what cost? You’re right; nonessential does not mean unnecessary in many cases.

  • klbout

    If the Federal Gov’t ONLY wasted $150 Billion a year, think about what every State could do for their citizens with $3 Billion extra in their Budgets every year, if they didn’t have to send it to the Leviathan in Washington to be wasted!

  • Jack Deth

    Federal employee and Reservist at Andrews AFB from 1976- 2009.

    Survived many federal shutdowns. Was always “essential”. Worked, got my paychecks for federal and Reserve time and orders.

    Just checked with my bank on-line and my retirement check is in place and ready to spend.

    Hasn’t rained blood, fire, nor brimstone.

    Tell me again when cats and dogs are supposed to start to cohabit?

    • Onyx

      If a million people that aren’t you lose their jobs, then fire and brimstone aren’t going to rain on you personally. But if you’re claiming that wouldn’t impact the broader economy, I have a bridge you might be interested in buying.

      • Jack Deth

        Your statement requires more punctuation.

        Run on sentences are not my forte.

        • Onyx

          Please proceed… where would you like additional punctuation?

  • Jake Wilde

    If all the workers furloughed started a business we would have many less problems. Knocking out many problems with one lemon.

    • SkyePuppy

      But if they had the tiniest entrepreneurial bone in their bodies, they wouldn’t have chosen the “safety and security” of government servitude in the first place.

  • TocksNedlog

    Let’s see . . . 800,000 x what, $50k? Oh wait, we’re talking government jobs here; 800,000 x $60-65k = $50 billion, or about one-twelfth of this year’s budget deficit. Meh, it’s just ‘a drop in the bucket’.

    • Arkuy The Great

      Like 535 people encased in concrete blocks on the bottom of the Potomac, it’s a start!

  • Arkuy The Great

    As I explained to someone at the water cooler this morning it is about time that government bureaucrats experienced some “funemployment”!

  • James Neal

    An Ace (the lapdog media) and Two Douches (Obama and Reid) don’t beat a Full House. Hang tough, Conservative Anarchists — it takes anarchy to dismantle tyranny.

  • in_awe

    Did you know that the federal government paid $75MM in 2012 to board excess “wild horses” on private ranches. That price will go up 25% this year as another 11,000 are shipped off to private retirement pastures. The wild horse population grows 15-20% per year and Congress set a limit of 23,000 and ordered that any beyond that number must be rounded up and relocated. By 2030 the feds will have spent $1.1B of taxpayer money to run resorts for horses. Australia had a similar policy and before long they wound up with 400,000 horses to deal with.

    Yea, yea. I know $75MM a year is chump change but when Pelosi says the cupboard is bare you know that there are hundreds of programs just like this one in every department of the federal government. But as long as the debt limit is raised and the Fed creates money out of thin air there is no incentive to address this waste.

  • Adela Wagner

    Anybody seen Biden? Yeah, me neither….

    • Michelle ✓classified

      He’s sitting in a corner somewhere trying to figure out how ya load a shotgun.

  • mambome

    From what I understand, the last time the government shut down, all the furloughed employees were later called back to work and received pay for that time retroactively, so what it really amounts to is a paid vacation for “non-essential” employees. We can’t even save money when we shut the damned thing down…

    • Onyx

      What do you think *should* happen? Half a million federal employees should lose a month’s wages because Boehner won’t put a clean CR to a vote?

      • mambome

        I’m just saying that all these sob stories of those affected by the shut down, are ridiculous. They will all be paid, and all of the expenses incurred during the shutdown will still be incurred.

      • RockThisTown

        Are you saying federal employees should get paid for work they didn’t do? When people get laid off from private industry, they don’t get back wages. They should get unemployment if they qualify, but if they’re unhappy with Boehner as one of their bosses, then no one is stopping them from finding work elsewhere.

      • Jack Deth

        Those who are deemed “non-essential” will still draw pay and accrue leaved time.

        Think of it as something Lois Lerner experienced after she pleaded the fifth during the IRS hearings a few months back.

  • Scottsdale Al

    Those non-essential workers account for 800,000 Dem votes and campaign contributions. Nothing like using taxpayer dollars to subsidize the Dems destroy America ideology.

  • Tesla_X

    I note the EPA and the dept of the interior are shut as well?

    That is a good thing, is it not?

    Perhaps a longer term shutdown could defund the EPA, and stimulate the economy and bring back lost energy jobs?

  • jb

    Here’s my problem with Pelosi: sh claims she doesn’t remember parrotting the wH talking point about “if you like your healthcare, u can keep it” THis, among many other things she doesn’t remember (like being told about waterboarding during the Bush admin): is she a liar, or truly, is there something seriously mentally wrong?

    • Jack Deth

      Frontal and parietal lob rot through extended use of Botox.

    • Axelgreaser

      Right on both counts. She’s certainly ‘mental’ as are Obama and Reid but she knows what she’s doing. She simply is an awful person working within an awful administration for an awful, destructive party. These three lie straight into the camera. Never mind there is video records to dispute their insane lying and that is a disorder. They should be brought to trial for lying to Americans and passing legislation that have been re-worked multiple times, gone from 1,200 ‘unread pages to nearly 30,000. THAT should be re-submitted to the SCOTUS for re-adjudication, it is NOT what even the lo-info’s signed on for.

  • Axelgreaser

    Sterling Catholic Lyosi must have to trim that nose every morning when she tweezes her chin hairs.