There were some very entertaining results in last night's Florida primaries for the upcoming 2026 elections. Most notable was Ukraine loyalist and carpetbagger Alex Vindman getting trounced in the Senate primary by DSA candidate Angie Dixon, despite having a 16-to-1 edge over her in Democratic big-donor campaign cash.
Normally, we wouldn't celebrate a Communist like Dixon winning a primary, but given her inability to speak to any issues that Floridians care about and the fact that Republican winner Ashley Moody received more votes all by herself than every Democrat candidate combined, we're pretty sure that Dixon doesn't stand a chance in November.
Moody single-handedly beat the full DEM field.
— The_Moderate_Virginian (@TheModerateVA) August 19, 2026
🤣 pic.twitter.com/diw6Kb4wj1
That's pretty awesome right there.
Besides, watching Vindman get humiliated is just too schadenfreudelicious to not enjoy. We can only imagine the tantrum his wife is throwing today.
But there was another result across the entire state that was far more meaningful than any individual race.
More than three million Floridians voted yesterday. And — miracle of miracles — everyone knew the results within hours. Not in the middle of the night after convenient 'water main breaks' and certainly not a week or even five weeks later.
Los Angeles 2026:
— End Wokeness (@EndWokeness) August 19, 2026
> 2.2 million ballots cast
> 6 full days to count to 85%
Florida 2026:
> 3.3 million ballots cast
> 45 minutes to count to 85%
One city in California (granted, a large city) counts votes like a third-world banana republic, while a whole state that just so happens to have the best governor in America managed to count 1.1 million more ballots in under an hour.
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Former Los Angeles mayoral candidate Spencer Pratt was baffled — BAFFLED, WE SAY — at what he was witnessing.
Wait. How did Florida count all their votes already?
— Spencer Pratt (@spencerpratt) August 19, 2026
I was reliably informed democracy takes 5 weeks.
Democracy takes less than a full evening.
But 'muh democracy,' as practiced by the Left, takes longer than a full moon cycle.
Weird, right?
Florida counted their votes the same night.
— Gunther Eagleman™ (@GuntherEagleman) August 19, 2026
Meanwhile California still needs five more weeks and a prayer circle. https://t.co/6l9CFiDd01
A prayer circle where everyone brings suitcases full of 'harvested' ballots.
Stealing elections takes longer.
— Dana (@OhMelodylane) August 19, 2026
Obviously.
After all, how can Democrats steal an election before they know how much stealing they're going to have to perform?
California cheats. pic.twitter.com/Vxb3C9h8Fy
— Nate k 🇺🇸 (@thenate36) August 19, 2026
It's simple mathematics ... with a healthy dollop of fraud.
India has 2X more people voting than the entire population of the US in Pratt’s time and they produce election results in precisely one day.
— ShadesOfBlueAndRed (@ShadesOfBlueAn1) August 19, 2026
"Numbers don’t produce greatness, cultures do" https://t.co/ADrJXoz2yX
India also does not allow, let alone enable, non-citizens to vote.
The same cannot be said of Los Angeles or any Democrat stronghold in America, as we recently saw in Minnesota.
It's not democracy if it takes five weeks to count the votes, and it's certainly not a republic. https://t.co/g5h0sBpCES
— El Jefe de Colorado Tweets (@jefe_tweets) August 19, 2026
California should be forced to vote the way India does. Everyone has to show up in person and must dip their finger in blue dye, so they can't vote more than once.
https://t.co/m3o8YEpOcI pic.twitter.com/rxeYi9MLNz
— Brock Juarez (@Juarez_Brock) August 19, 2026
LOL.
We're sure Gavin Newsom or Karen Bass will accuse Ron DeSantis of some type of sorcery to be able to count votes so quickly.
I love it here so much. 🇺🇸 pic.twitter.com/RkzrwkZNWH
— Red Floridian (@aykmwt) August 19, 2026
Florida's election laws should be the national standard.
The good news is that some other states are noticing and following suit.
Arizona has a Florida elections change on the ballot this November
— Tyler Bowyer (@tylerbowyer) August 19, 2026
Thank you @realAlexKolodin ! https://t.co/Wa2JIR3JtD
Hopefully, that will mark the end of the Maricopa County chicanery that we've seen in past elections.
Counting votes in California be like: pic.twitter.com/DbEGxsrj21
— Corbin Williams (@corbinwilliams) August 19, 2026
HA!
Are they still 'counting' in California?
We think they might still be counting.
Did you just fall out of a coconut 🥥 tree 🥥 🌳, oh sorry it takes 5 weeks in California because some drinking have a people problem 😄 pic.twitter.com/1PK2iAutsd
— Kris John Kinsey (@KinseyJohn30181) August 19, 2026
Kamala Harris's razor-thin past wins in California absolutely deserve a second look.
Cheating takes 5 weeks. Election Day in CA is really about data collection. pic.twitter.com/JtEsE667tz
— Elle💎 🎗 (@beachgirlCA) August 19, 2026
We are required to clarify that this is an AI-generated video.
But ... ahem ... it's also pretty darn accurate.
Please stop. Your questions are cruelty. Demanding people to perform simple tasks in a reasonable time frame is genocide. Stop being a genocider. You're a monster. Like that drink. But meaner.
— Nk McGregor (@mandoomscroll) August 19, 2026
LOL.
Like the Bass video above, this is funny because it is exactly what leftists will say to Pratt for questioning the eons-long election process in California.
There is one very objective proof point that demonstrates a well managed state versus a completely dysfunctional state - how long it takes to count votes in an election.
— Bryan Beal 🎧 (@bryanrbeal) August 19, 2026
Florida does it almost instantly, and California takes weeks.
It’s literally impossible to argue that a… https://t.co/mN8XyE9xQx
... weeks-long vote counting process is a symptom of a well managed government.
It may be impossible to argue that, but Democrats will still try.
Because they would never get elected across most of the country if not for the fraud.
And I had to show ID! Pass the Save Act! pic.twitter.com/7KVVZ3tupT
— Rob Bemis (@Bostonbemis) August 19, 2026
As Elissa Slotkin recently (and accidentally) admitted herself, if the SAVE America Act passes and voter ID is required in every election, Democrats might never win a race again.
Let's imagine, along with Spencer Pratt, how great THAT America would be.
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