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Society Thrives on Marriage and Birth Celebrations— Not Birthday Extravaganzas for the Single

AP Photo/Douglas C. Pizac, File

In August, I turned 50. I’ve never been someone who makes a big fuss over birthdays. Growing up, my family kept things simple—a nice cake, a family dinner, and that was plenty. I never had a husband who cared enough to celebrate me, so I expected my 50th to be the same: quiet, low-key, and perfectly fine with me.

Then my cousin stepped in. She offered to host a weekend getaway, and several of my oldest childhood friends came into town. It was incredibly thoughtful and genuinely lovely. Still, I felt uncomfortable with all the attention focused on me. I’m deeply grateful she loved me enough to plan something so special, but it’s not an experience I’ll repeat.

I’ve noticed that many women my age feel very differently. For them, milestone birthdays have become a big deal—sometimes even a multi-day celebration. This seems especially true for single women or those of us who divorced later in life and know we won’t have golden anniversaries or the traditional milestones that once marked a long marriage. It’s not my style, but I understand why it matters to so many. What started as a personal desire has quietly turned into its own little industry.

I personally wish more young people desired marriage, home, and children again in their early 20s. I believe that’s what’s healthiest for individuals and for society as a whole. 

Extending the 'wild young adulthood' phase for another full decade — into the late 20s and even early 30s — has been a mistake. What was meant to be a short season of freedom and exploration has stretched into a prolonged period of instability, delayed responsibilities, and often quiet regret. 

Probably better than calling them an 'Old Maid".

Women sense what’s been lost: an age when men conquered frontiers, waged wars, and raised cathedrals—rather than staring at their own reflections at a friend’s milestone brunch.

And it's not for the better. 

What a beautiful sentiment. I hope they get this chance, too. It's what life is all about. Birthdays are great, but what you do between those birthdays is what is most important. 

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