I am blessed to have this platform to share the news of the day with you, our dear readers. I try to do good with this honor and today, the best I can do for this family is share their story.
Hopefully, as more people are made aware, accountability will come to fruition and this family will get the resolution they very much deserve.
My daughter (now 14) has cancer. I want to talk about one of the most frustrating, painful, angering, parts of that experience. Not nausea, or hair loss, or even our health insurance. I'm talking, of course, about @MakeAWish, the worst charity I've ever dealt with.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Thread: 1/ pic.twitter.com/pAY0vIWU4j
The story starts with a Dad telling the story of his daughter's cancer diagnosis and her wish to be granted by the Make-A-Wish Foundation.
See the whole cancer story in my pinned tweet but essentially she was diagnosed in March 2021 with osteosarcoma. Multiple surgeries and chemo and now only has a tiny single tumor in her left lung. Not perfect but she's strong and living. Outlook is... Ok? Better than 50/50.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
2/
When she was diagnosed and we were in that shock period, her oncologist, looking to deliver any sort of good news, said the team would make a referral to @MakeAWish and there was a good chance Makenna would qualify. It did give her hope. And something good to think about.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
3/
After the doctor left the room, one of the nurses said (about the @MakeAWish comment), "Ugh, we really wish he wouldn't do that." That should have been my first inkling of trouble, but in my post-diagnosis fog it didn't occur to me. A sign of things to (not) come.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
4/
The nurses in a hospital generally always know what is truly going on, so their warning now looks very prescient.
Months went by during treatment. The first step in @makeawish process is a "wish box" - a shoebox thing for Makenna to put her wish ideas into. I remember jubilation at our house when this arrived. Along with it was a letter saying she was "medically qualified" for a wish.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
5/
From stories we've heard, @makeawish can be opaque in terms of how "serious" someone's illness or situation needs to be to "qualify" for a wish. Nevertheless, in pediatric cancer world (the best family no one wants to be a part of), everyone qualifies. Score one for Big C.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
6/
Fall 2021 Makenna's primary treatment ended, and she went into remission. Around December 2021, @makeawish folks reached out to collect Makenna's wish box and meet with us via Zoom to discuss her wishes.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
7/
Jan 2022 we had the first Zoom meetings. The wish "granter" almost immediately said "no trips." COVID was still a thing and @makeawish wasn't doing trips.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Concerning for me - an organization which gave out thousands of trips a year hadn't figured out a COVID plan in 2 years?
8/
So, the family initially asked for a family vacation, but because 'COVID', no trips were being granted, apparently. So, they had to choose a wish that wasn't travel.
Recommended
On her revised list, she moved the trips down and put her new #1 at the top - a "she shed." She described it as a hangout where she could watch TV, have juice and snacks in a little fridge, chat with her friends, and escape the treatment life (and her brothers).
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
10/
Makenna shared specific details in these meetings with @MakeAWish folks. I remember them fondly. She clipped pictures and picked rugs.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
I thought her ideas were terrific. She wants to be an interior designer when she grows up, so trust me - she had an eye for this stuff.
11/
@makeawish folks were similarly enthused. And in Feb 2022 they congratulated us - "Makenna has been chosen and we are going to make her dream "she shed" come true!"
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
We were grateful. But the minor foibles we saw before this point were nothing compared to what was to come.
12/
In February 2022, the wish was GRANTED! How exciting! You can imagine for parents with a very ill child, this was a huge bright spot to focus on.
March 2022, @MakeAWish contacts me to get pictures of my yard, details of where we want it placed, and challenges of the spot. Our yard is virtually flat and to bring the shed to this spot would be just a matter of driving across grass.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
13/ pic.twitter.com/q9saykZO8Q
Along with the pictures, I sent them specific details. This is just one of several emails where we've described Makenna's vision in writing
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
We believed they were taking this in and collecting these thoughts for the final delivery. We figured that would be Spring/Summer 2022
14/ pic.twitter.com/HFIz7Cmu1X
@makeawish folks told us they reached out to Town officials to clear permits, etc.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
The problem was, they spoke to the wrong Town. Not our Town. A different one, in a different County.
This isn't huge, it's happened to us before, but it was the first big thing I had to fix.
15/
So, the permitting issues are eventually managed by the family and not much help from Make-A-WIsh.
June 2022. Shed builders call us - hooray! They are done building the structure. Now @makeawish needs to find someone to prep the site and do the details/inside, says shed builders.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
I ask Make-A-Wish for details on her shed. They defer. This would become their pattern.
18/
Then, @makeawish goes silent. Months go by. No one has told me any details of the shed or when to expect installation. No one has told me if I need to run electrical or if they will.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
I inquire but no one responds. My daughter keeps asking. She has (and beats) a relapse.
19/
Aug 2022, @makeawish tells me someone will be contacting me about placing the shed and "leveling" the ground. No one does. I write back 3 weeks later, they again say someone will be contacting me, weeks go by again, no one does. This is their pattern.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
20/
Nov 2022 - a strange truck pulls in my driveway. It is the owner of the shed building company. He literally says he did not know if we were still alive. He hasn't heard from @MakeAWish in months and the shed is on their lot collecting dust.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Awkward for me, to say the least
22/
Eventually, the shed maker drives to the family's home because they can't get in touch with anyone from Make-A-Wish. What a nightmare. During all of this, this family is also going though multiple instances of cancer returning.
Finally, in late Nov 2022, @MakeAWish tells me they are going to wait until Spring. Apparently they can't dump gravel in winter.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
A very mild winter goes by, with plenty of chances to do just that.
We hear nothing from Make-A-Wish. We are a year into the process.
23/
So, now they are told to wait until Spring which is months away.
March 2023 goes by with no word. Then April. We are well into Spring weather.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
No one contacts us. Instead, I email the regional director of @makeawish. I share my concerns that this is taking ridiculously long for a shed, and that the details have not been shared with me.
24/
We've made it to March of this year and no word again, so the Dad begins to reach out to the charity.
March 2023 goes by with no word. Then April. We are well into Spring weather.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
No one contacts us. Instead, I email the regional director of @makeawish. I share my concerns that this is taking ridiculously long for a shed, and that the details have not been shared with me.
24/
Here is my very long email to the director.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
26/ pic.twitter.com/C1OTWbpHMw
Here is his response.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Nothing detailed. Nothing addressing my concerns.
Just this. And an assurance they would follow up within the week.
They did not.
27/ pic.twitter.com/SYylnUI3rm
I think we can all agree that brief reply to a very long detailed email would be very frustrating.
Three weeks later (May 19 2023) I get an email from his VP, telling me the shed builders are "2-3 weeks out" from installation.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
This is news to me. They are doing it now? Not another company? And what about all my other questions I asked the director??
I reply yet again.
28/ pic.twitter.com/j5KkqF4Xu3
Note that I **specifically** say in my email that I am bothered by their inability to answer direct questions, and their foisting me off on other people instead of answering me.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Their response, of course, is to ignore my direct questions and foist me off on someone else.
29/ pic.twitter.com/RQFSqRkTnh
I have been the only one dealing with @makeawish since March 2022.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Yet now, Make-A-Wish calls my **wife** to, yet again, "get details" of Makenna's wish from her and from Makenna. They give the same details again. They also ask for dates we will be away. Hold on to that bit
30/
Note this person is someone different yet again from the others we've been working with.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
This person copies my wife on an email back to the people in the office we've been working with, containing all Makenna's details and that we will be away for 2 weeks starting 7/5/23
31/
We hear nothing from @makeawish.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
We shortened our trip, but 7/9 we left to drive from our home to @WaltDisneyWorld. We were towing our RV to stay at Fort Wilderness.
A brief aside on this trip...
32/
We are alright financially. But between expenses of cancer, my older son going to college, and the potential of Makenna needing to enroll in a trial in faraway Philadelphia, we are stretched extremely thin.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
But Makenna is on her 3rd relapse now.
33/
This is the most heartbreaking part to me. This child is now in her third relapse. The parents are terrified their time with their child is limited and they are having to deal with this aggravation. It is unconscionable to me.
We took this vacation because we don't know if we will ever be able to take a vacation as a family of 5 again. Yes, I mean what you think I mean.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
That's how special this vacation was, and how much we needed it to be peaceful and stress free.
Somehow we made it 1250 miles.
34/
July 12. Our 2nd day in Disney. I get an email from @MakeAWish saying shed people are going to install "this weekend."
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
I reply within an hour saying we are in Disney until 7/18. They reply asking if "a family member" can be there. Our family lives 300 miles away, I reply.
35/
The family finally decided to take a vacation on their own and SUDDENLY Make-A-Wish is ready to deliver the shed. While the family is in Orlando trying to enjoy what could be a last family vacation. Dear readers, I am livid.
The next day (Thursday 7/13) @MakeAWish responds asking "if we need to reschedule." I reply and say I wasn't aware we had "scheduled" in the first place and that, given the delays and misunderstandings already, I don't want it done without me there.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Radio silence.
36/
Oh! I almost forgot. Leading up to our Disney trip, Makenna had been receiving packages in the mail.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
A small battery operated lamp. A single bean bag chair.
Some kind of shelf and nesting tables that needed to be assembled.
It appeared to be items for the shed.
37/
But no word on what these things were. They just showed up. No word on who was to assemble them.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
I brought all this up in my 7/13 email to @MakeAWish. You'll never guess what their response was.
No, of course you will... They ignored my questions.
38/
Friday, 7/14. We head to WDW Hollywood Studios. Suddenly, there is an email from @MakeAWish and my phone is BLOWING UP. They "need" me to call them. I say the hell with this. I need to enjoy my vacation. I told them 7/18 I'll be back. It can wait.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
39/
They call my wife. Because, dear readers, you know my wife is a nice person, she picks up. I hear her telling people I'm here. It's the shed builders. It's Friday (@MakeAWish said "this weekend") and they are en route to our house to dig up the ground and place the she shed.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
40/
They call my wife. Because, dear readers, you know my wife is a nice person, she picks up. I hear her telling people I'm here. It's the shed builders. It's Friday (@MakeAWish said "this weekend") and they are en route to our house to dig up the ground and place the she shed.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
40/
I am sick that this will be done without me there, but I don't really have much choice, I figure. The shed builders are a small business trapped with this shitshow just like me. I say "whatever". I tell my wife she'll be coming home to a shed.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
42/
AFTER this, I get a text from @MakeAWish saying they "don't think we can stop" the shed builders from doing the work and "on the upswing Makenna will have a nice surprise when she comes home." The incredible tone-deafness is something to behold with these people.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
43/
Apparently, Make-A-Wish doesn't realize most homeowners don't look forward to a permanent structure in their backyard when they aren't home and don't see that as a fun surprise.
Sure enough, we come home and it's there.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Roughly in the right place (thanks to the owner coming out previously) but piles of dirt all around where I didn't want it.
And the inside of the shed is.... Barren. Literally nothing. Bare wood and splinters and a wasp nest. pic.twitter.com/ghCzCEsmRb
Wife & 2 younger kids flew home Monday. My older son and I went on a 28-hour-straight drive all through the night to pull our RV home by Tuesday 7/18.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
We are exhausted. I don't want to think about the shed, but there it is. It looks cute from the outside. But it's unusable
45/
Two days later, I get this.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
When I tell you that I admire the sheer freaking audacity of @MakeAWish, I am being sincere. If everyone had this level of absolute balls-to-the-wall audacity to ask this after the ridiculous mess I went through, we'd be living among the stars.
46/ pic.twitter.com/WWGimZeWyr
It's literally an empty unfinished shed. Just what every little girl dreams about.
Needless to say, I wrote yet another long email detailing the process and everything we went through. I made it clear this was NOT Makenna's vision, it was NOT usable for what she wished for, and it was essentially just a monument to their ineptitude.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
47/
Part of my email. I think I was holding back, really. After 2 years of screw ups, only to deliver something my daughter did not want, failing to keep their promise to her, I was measured in response.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
(My wife convinced me to say "face" instead of "dick")
48/ pic.twitter.com/f1kFH7Tj9O
And that brings us to now.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
They replied. They want to speak to me like some kind of customer satisfaction survey. pic.twitter.com/CYNYk4MnLK
Can't Make-A-Wish ever send this family a decent email that actually addresses their concerns instead of the pithy quick replies?
I don't know what I want.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
First and foremost, I want no more kids to have to suffer as mine did. I beg you to find some charity doing good work to end childhood cancer and donate your last dollar to them.
Second, I want my daughter to be healthy.
But after that?
50/
I really want Makenna to see her vision come to reality. She put such thought & feeling into her wish and @MakeAWish just ignored it to get *something* done and cross us off.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
I want those moments back I wasted on the first real vacation I've taken since she was diagnosed.
51/
This child has gone through hell on Earth and deserves to have her much anticipated shed finished.
Yes, I know, I got something for free. But did I? If someone promises you a trip to Disney World when you have a life-threatening illness, and 2 years later they take you to a booth in the mall selling knock-off Mickey Mouse shirts and wash their hands of you, are you happy?
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
52/
Yes, it was free, but people donate to charities under the belief people will get beautiful wishes granted at that most difficult time of their lives. If this 'charity' is making it this difficult for parents, maybe people should know that and send their money elsewhere.
I don't want to seem ungrateful, but what (in @MakeAWish) do I have to be grateful for? If they'd done nothing, fine. But they promised something and then did less than nothing.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
There are so many other charities that GET IT. That know what cancer families are going through.
53/
@curekidscancer_ there from Day 1 offering support right in the hospital.@13thirtyCancer the coolest group ever for teens & young adults with cancer.@AnnasWish makes Christmas magic for cancer families.@WillieBeeCares the "little charity that could," always popping up to help.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
I am happy to hear so many charities do live up to their mission of serving families of pediatric cancer patients. Perhaps, those charities deserve the support of the public more than Make-A-Wish.
I'll finish the she shed and it will be perfect for my daughter. I don't know how or when or with what money but I will. I just can't get all the time back, especially my soured vacation
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
I'll add it to the project list along with son's car, college, my car, house stuff, etc
57/
The family should not be responsible for finishing the she shed. That is unfair to parents possibly looking at mere months left with their sweet child.
In the meantime here's a palate cleanser.
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Mickey Mouse came through lunch. He saw me holding Makenna's button saying "celebrating cancer survivor." Mickey (the person inside) was genuinely taken aback, and gave Makenna the longest, tightest, hug I've ever seen from a character. pic.twitter.com/BhmFhqhmz6
Ok one more. The whole family getting ready to head out of Magic Kingdom (and home the next day).
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
Fin/ pic.twitter.com/lSJRekhvri
Several people asked to donate to the family to finish off the she shed. Dad did provide his Venmo but said he may just donate the money he receives to charities that do work on behalf of families as they have a hard time asking the public for help.
This is my Venmo. Beware any money raised may be passed on to one of the many fine charities who has helped Makenna. 😊😊😊 It's tough for us to ask for help.https://t.co/Ku9JQoEvN7 pic.twitter.com/gYD3HiUJhg
— Dan (@TractorLaw) July 24, 2023
So sorry for all you went through with @MakeAWish which sadly seems to have gotten too big for their britches. I’ve heard many negative stories & seems they’ve become mostly a grift rather than helping kids like your beautiful daughter. She & your entire family are in my prayers.
— 🇺🇸PebsMama🐻🇺🇸 (@KerryG1016) July 24, 2023
Apparently, this isn't an isolated incident. My mission is to share this story to spare any other families this heartache and bring a spotlight on a charity that clearly needs a shake up. I hope sharing this story might get this family some relief. As a parent, I know all they really want is their child's good health, but as human beings, the most we can effect is making their physical circumstances easier. Please share this story and pray for this dear family. Help me demand Make-A-Wish makes this right for this child. I thank you in advance for helping me use this platform for good.
