Scott Mann, who is a Conservative Member of Parliament who represents North Cornwall, UK in the House of Commons has an idea on how to finally stop knife crime: GPS trackers in “every knife sold,” with an exception for fishing, of course:

No, apparently it’s not a parody:

Pretty much:

And how exactly would this work once a knife crime was committed?

This is the future they want:

Not to mention the cost of this future:

Or maybe just put a chip in the really dangerous knives:

Next step: