Meet Nigel, the so called “loneliest bird in the world.” He was lonely because he fell in love with a stone decoy placed on island off of New Zealand in an effort to get other birds to nest on the island. Anyway,  only Nigel showed up and now he’s dead:

The real monsters here are the scientists (Looking at you Bill Nye and Neil deGrasse Tyson). From Gizmodo:

Twenty years ago, conservationists in New Zealand placed 80 fake gannet birds on Mana Island in an attempt to attract some real-life gannets. But only one bird finally showed up in 2015. That bird, which locals named Nigel, spent years in a futile effort to woo a mate who was made of concrete. But sadly, Nigel has been found dead next to his stone cold partner.

Conservationists were incredibly excited when Nigel arrived on the island in 2015, the first gannet to make Mana its home in 40 years. But Nigel’s story quickly turned depressing when it became clear that not only was Nigel tragically alone, but that he was trying to woo one of the concrete birds.

The story took an even darker turn as in the past few weeks, three real birds were enticed by the fake birds and decided to make their home on the island. But, alas, Nigel only had eyes for the fake bird:

Blue-check Twitter is having a collective sad over Nigel’s death. Which is weird because this is literally science — you know, Darwinism in action? — but science is apparently only important when being used to bash conservatives and justify trillions of dollars of projects of dubious merit all in the name of decarbonification:

No anger at the scientists? Why not?


Tags: Nigel