IOC member “Dick Pound” says the Summer Olympics in Tokyo may have to be cancelled because of the coronavirus outbreak:

He’s the IOC’s longest-serving member, you know:

And here’s the response from Trojan condoms on this very important story that could impact millions around the world:

Exit question: Who does Dick Pound speak for?

Hey, don’t blame us. We didn’t name him that:

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Editor’s note: We’ve corrected a typo in the headline.