'It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from youuuu ...
There's nothin' that a hundred men or more could ever dooo ...
I bless the rains down in ... Galveston?'
No, we're not playing 'Name That Tune' this morning. Today's game is called 'How Many Brain Cells Does Joe Biden Have Left?'
But given the fact that Biden's mental record is skipping again, we thought we'd add a little theme music to today's game.
On Thursday, Biden's body was medevaced to Galveston, Texas, to talk about Juneteenth because he grew up a poor, black child in Scranton ... or something.
We're not sure why he was there, honestly. All we know is that when Biden got to the subject of slavery, the DJ in his head decided to start scratching at the word 'Africa.' Watch:
Biden: "I've been through all of Africa. I used to be there for a long, long time. Africa. Africa. I've been to the origins of where slavery started." pic.twitter.com/lo5cf0JnRV
— TheBlaze (@theblaze) June 20, 2025
LOL. Wut?
We don't really like this Toto remix. But at least Biden didn't tell everyone another Uncle Bosey story, for which we are grateful.
As for the origins of slavery, maybe Biden might want to have a word with the Jews about that one.
But we digress.
— Collin Pruett (@pruett_collin) June 20, 2025
LOL. That poor minister. We're thinking he might be having some regrets about inviting Biden to his Juneteenth celebration.
"If you don't think I used to be there for a long, long time, then you ain't black." - Joe Biden's ghost
— LaJuett (@patriotlajuett) June 20, 2025
Yeah, umm, what was he talking about there?
When, exactly, did Biden spend 'a long, long time' in Africa?
And did Beau die there, too?
We know, Joe, we know. @Grok has the pictures. pic.twitter.com/teMLDca57z
— Mrs Malindo (@MrsMalindo) June 20, 2025
In between playing quarterback for Navy and driving long-haul trucks, Biden spent a few years as a tribal chieftain.
“Dear sweet Uncle Bozey 😭😭” https://t.co/vhsuexMkTb
— Lizzy Lou Who 🌷 (@_wintergirl93) June 20, 2025
African cannibals took him, and the Biden family never saw him again.
“I was eaten by cannibals, twice…”
— Tracy 🇺🇸 (@TracyJHoban) June 20, 2025
No joke. They were bad dudes.
We finally know the inspiration for Toto's song. https://t.co/Myso5Qp9QB
— RedInDC 💐 (@RealRedInDC) June 20, 2025
C'mon, man! Biden used to jam with Toto all the time. Corn Pop played drums.
There is nothing Joe Biden hasn't done. https://t.co/djrUNIYMN4
— Cody Penn-Dent (@codypd) June 20, 2025
What a Renaissance man he is. We should all be thankful for him.
Biden The Congregation https://t.co/eFaumuDk6T pic.twitter.com/eCu0dMVE6x
— Extremely Careless (@Shanghaibeast) June 20, 2025
HA!
It's probably a good thing that the camera never panned to the people sitting in the pews.
Yes, it's true..... I was once a slave.... :D https://t.co/CxYX22g5nh
— THE DC PROTOCOL (@Screenwriter6) June 20, 2025
A slave to chocolate-chocolate chip, right?
— Tracy 🇺🇸 (@TracyJHoban) June 20, 2025
Too bad the Easter Bunny wasn't in Galveston on Juneteenth to whisk Biden away to safety.
“We missed the story” https://t.co/T1K2XGsQKn
— Brother Seamus (@WaynePelota) June 21, 2025
Paging Jake Tapper. Mr. Jake Tapper, please report to the 'We Lied to Everyone for Years' courtesy phone.
Oh, well. It's good to see the old codger out there, being the 'best Biden ever.' Right, Joe Scarborough?
We'll close with a musical outro, returning to the song that must have been running through Biden's head as he made up another Walter Mitty story for the ages.
🎶It's gonna take a lot to drag me away from you
— FilmLadd (@FilmLadd) June 20, 2025
There's nothin' that a hundred men or more could ever do
I bless the rains down in Africa
I bless the rains down in Africa (I bless the rains) 🎶 https://t.co/fuyEBP7OzV
We just hope Biden comes out of carbon freezing again on the Fourth of July, so he can tell us all about how he fought back the British at Lexington and Concord.
Where, sadly, Beau also died.
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