Major league sports are doing all they can to kiss up to the Black Lives Matter movement (with the extra effort award going to the WNBA, what with their T-shirts with “bullet holes” in the back), but what are you supposed to do if you’re not a jock but ended up in the marching band instead? New York Times escapee Bari Weiss notes that the Columbia University Marching Band has issued a letter explaining why they’re dissolving the band. Apparently the organization has come to reckon with “the injury it has caused to our members and the broader Columbia community.” Did they just suck, or is there more to it?
The marching band (!!) at @Columbia was apparently “founded on the basis of racism, cultural oppression, misogyny, and sexual harassment.” This left the band no choice but to disband “unanimously and enthusiastically.” pic.twitter.com/P5FFFx5PtP
— Bari Weiss (@bariweiss) September 15, 2020
That’s the horrible truth: The marching band “has maintained a club structure founded on the basis of racism, cultural oppression, misogyny, and sexual harassment,” and only dissolving the band will “provide relief to the present suffering of the Columbia community and time to heal from the decades of harm caused by this organization.”
Your former employer will defend this madness.
— Sandy 〽️ (@RightGlockMom) September 15, 2020
I’m old enough to remember when bands broke up because of Yoko Ono.
— Christopher J. Scalia (@cjscalia) September 15, 2020
"more than twenty Band members in attendance."
Sounds like it died from lack of interest.
— Crapplefratz – The Hipster Wookie (@Crapplefratz) September 15, 2020
This world just gets dumber and dumber.
— Lady L. North (@LadyLNorth) September 15, 2020
Columbia had a marching band?
— CRM (@curticemang) September 15, 2020
They can't be serious, can they? Can they?
— servative (@servative) September 15, 2020
Oh, gee…. And I was so looking forward to their next performance! ?
— Woodrow McRae (@mcrae_woodrow) September 15, 2020
Is this a SNL episode? You have to be kidding me.
— Ann (@Msragarcia) September 15, 2020
I laughed when I read it. I thought it was an over-the-top spoof.
— SarpeleGlykon (@SGlykon) September 15, 2020
Is this the moment that truly jumps the shark? … (Doubtful)
— Kyle Sitton (@kmfs1) September 15, 2020
Strong fall of the Roman Empire vibes, circa 3rd Century
— Jack Riminton (@jackrim1) September 15, 2020
“…no choice…” are the words that stand out the most.
— Kenneth Kaplan (@drkenkaplan) September 15, 2020
Well it’s about time.?
— Dan Burke (@DeBurca9) September 15, 2020
What took them so long?
— Future Symphony Inst (@FutureSymphony) September 15, 2020
Except presumably, now that they no longer exist, they can't prevent another group of students from starting a new Columbia University Marching Band immediately.
— Paul Graham (@paulg) September 15, 2020
This reads like a struggle session confession.
— Just The Facts, Man (@JustAFactsMan) September 15, 2020
Could they at least play the last song that the band played on the Titanic
— Harlan (@harlan_county) September 15, 2020
As a Columbia grad I did not know we had a matching band.
— Meade McFarlane (@Meade209) September 15, 2020
2020 just doin it’s thing.
— Just Dave (@hokieheel2) September 15, 2020
Vox: Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony ‘is a symbol of exclusion and elitism’ to women, LGBTQ+ people, and people of color https://t.co/44L1crWQEm
— Twitchy Team (@TwitchyTeam) September 15, 2020
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