As Twitchy reported earlier Tuesday, The Independent suggested that phrases like “bring home the bacon” could be banned to avoid offending vegans, and that “increased awareness of vegan issues will filter through consciousness to produce new modes of expression.”

We know that PETA, on another one of its misguided publicity stunts, is offering animal cruelty-free alternatives for several phrases, but we can’t think of a more apt one for PETA than “jumped the shark.”

And in case you didn’t think they were serious, they’re comparing their effort to the clampdown on homophobic and racist language.

We’re thinking it’s going to take a long time for “feed two birds with one scone” to catch on.