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'Wow. He's toast now.' How will Howard Schultz survive this devastating oppo hit?

Howard Schultz has only been publicly exploring a political career for a couple of days, and already he’s been dissected under a more powerful media microscope than any other confirmed Democratic presidential candidate. And why? Because he has the nerve to criticize the unsustainable, unfeasible economic policies being touted by Democratic presidential hopefuls like Kamala Harris and Elizabeth Warren.

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Check out this shocking scoop from the Daily Beast:

Howard Schultz, the former Starbucks CEO now actively contemplating an independent presidential bid, has had a tricky history dealing with race issues.

…

Schultz, in his new book, apologized for the 2015 campaign, acknowledging that it was “patronizing.” But if more evidence is needed that race could become a complicating factor in a possible presidential run, one need look no further than the former CEO’s music store.

Wow. This sounds serious, you guys. What heinous racial musical crime did Howard Schultz commit?

Where are our pearls? We must clutch them. How will Starbucks explain this one away?

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A Starbucks official did not return a request for comment.

You don’t say! Maybe that’s because the Starbucks official knows that this line of attack is absolutely effing ridiculous.

If Howard Schultz’s presidential ambitions implode, we sincerely hope it won’t be because of something this stupid.

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Update:

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