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US thanks Saudi government for accepting Gitmo prisoners, ensuring 'humane treatment'

Anyone paying attention knows by now that President Obama is capable of simultaneously juggling dozens of No. 1 priorities, among them the closing of Guantanamo Bay and the release of all prisoners held there — something he promised would be completed “no later than 1 year” from the signing of his January 2009 executive order.

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Only recently did the administration send out a team to scout out locations in the United States to host our guests at Gitmo, but — surprise! — neither Congress nor the governors of the proposed states are cooperating. Not to mention, the president’s new best pal Raul Castro said he’d like the military base back, though we can’t imagine what use he’d have for a prison on his island paradise.

Fortunately, the president has found a friend in need. While he was busy scouring the golf course yet again for signs of ISIS militants, Saudi Arabia, home of 15 of the 19 terrorists who carried out 9/11, took nine prisoners off of his hands.

Each of the prisoner’s cases underwent a thorough review “as directed by the president’s Jan. 22, 2009, executive order,” read a statement from the Department of Defense.

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That is a damned shame, but at least Saudi Arabia, if not the U.S. Congress, can be entrusted to carry out the humanitarian gesture that Americans just won’t do and “ensure these transfers took place consistent with appropriate security and humane treatment measures.”

The statement by the Department of Defense reads, in part:

The United States is grateful to the government of the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia for its humanitarian gesture and willingness to support ongoing U.S. efforts to close the Guantanamo Bay detention facility. The United States coordinated with government of the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia to ensure these transfers took place consistent with appropriate security and humane treatment measures.

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Although the DOD statement only names the prisoners, Carol Rosenberg, the Miami Herald’s Guantanamo Bay reporter, likes to make sure each inmate is given the personal touch, Dating Game style. Ali al Raimi, for example, “kept himself productive with drawing, painting, and sculpture.”

Believe it or not, the board does still deny parole to certain prisoners. Former Bin Laden bodyguard Muhammed al Ansi, for example, whose lawyer says he loves American culture and watching “The Fast and the Furious” movie series and “The Walking Dead” at Guantánamo, wasn’t cleared at a parole board meeting last month.

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