You might remember back in August when Papa John’s Pizza and its founder, John Schnatter, came under fire and the threat of a boycott from progressives. Why? Schanatter told shareholders on a conference call that Obamacare, when implemented, would cost the chain an extra 11 to 14 cents per pizza.

Shocking, right? Not really. It’s only when you put Schnatter’s words through the liberal outrage translator that you come up with the idea that Schnatter’s a rich, selfish, out-of-touch one-percenter who’s too cheap to spend 11 cents to buy his employees heath insurance. Liberals immediately rushed to say they’d happily pay more to provide workers insurance, and that they’d be boycotting the chain.

If you’ve never heard of the liberal outrage translator, ask anti-bullying expert Dan Savage if you can borrow his, so you can turn the following tweet, by the founder of Americans For Truth About Homosexuality, into a short play called “Jesus and the Huge Asshole.”

What would Jesus do? Who better to ask than Savage, who recently called Christian high school students “pansy assed” for walking out an anti-bullying speech, then taunted them to return, saying “I’m done beating up the Bible.”

And thus was born “Jesus and the Huge Asshole.” In case you didn’t know how Jesus felt about Obamacare, now you do.

Savage’s followers applaud the realistic portrayal of GOP thinking, and for his succinct condensation of the 2,700-page Obamacare bill.

  • Rob Roth

    50 cents for a $6 sandwich = 8.3% increase on cost.
    You get 12 months of food for the cost of 13!
    Liberals: protecting the poor since…. wait, when?

    • WingedBishop

      They’re protecting the poor by keeping them from going extinct.

  • cfcscott1905

    Who can understand anything this Savage guy says with that stupid pillow is his mouth??

  • tsluf273

    Dan Savage presumes much if he thinks he knows what Jesus is thinking.

  • pixelsmith24

    I’m so glad my Jesus isn’t like the one portrayed here.

  • Zane Henry

    Typical entitlement attitude: “You can afford to give just a LITTLE more.” Problem is, they come back every single year saying the same thing. Guess how that works out over 50 or 60 years.

    • CalCon10

      Income tax started at 1% on only the very wealthiest. “Inconceivable” that it would go much higher…less than 10 years later, the top bracket was more than 50%.

  • radjahshelduck

    So the same liberals who assume it is no problem for anybody to pay 50 cents more for lunch simultaneously assume it is a huge problem for Georgetown Law students to pay 12 bucks a month for their birth control?

  • sleazyrider

    Ummmm…50 cent more on my sandwich …$1 per night for your contraceptives …$$$ on your section 8 housing…$$$$ for your EBT card…$$$ for your obama phone…etc….etc….

    • sleazyrider

      Can I keep some of it….since I didn’t mind working for it…

  • Jesus believer

    I highly doubt Dan Savage will be able to explain these comments when he is facing the throne of Heaven and Jesus in person.. Just saying.

    • Pete Futz

      just agreeing!

  • TocksNedlog

    Savage has Jesus say “all I asked in return was for you to be nice to each other.” And Savage WOULD be living by that maxim himself, IF he believed in Jesus. Luckily for him, he does not believe, which frees him up to be the biggest asshole in the history of assholes.

    • Shawn Smith

      And if you, ya know, actually read Jesus’ words, instead of making up your own, you’d realize there’s quite a bit more than that. He showed us that the standard we have to live up to is perfection—completely out of our reach. The whole point is that we are completely helpless without him.

      Or maybe we can just let the government mandate what kind of people we’re supposed to be and be as lazy as possible.

      • Stephanie Warren

        No, he did not.

        • Shawn Smith

          Which part are you disagreeing with?

  • GoSellCrazySomeplaceElse

    I guess if the government raises the amount of money on their EBT cards they will be able to afford all the price hikes on food, tatoos and piercings. Oh, yeah…we’re paying for that, too.

  • Joe W.

    This guy/gal is sick. Pray for him…difficult as it may be…

  • WingedBishop

    So is Obamacare the reason my Comcast Internet bill keeps going up?

  • ZoriahShepard

    Dan Savage is exercising his right to use free speech. Is anyone rioting yet? Has anyone bombed Twitter HQ for allowing this?
    Yeah. Didn’t think so.

  • dennylee60

    Jesus: “You did not tell me that $.50 goes toward killing babies!”

  • CalCon10

    So now, public blasphemy. “Charming.”

    If there is a depth to which leftists will not sink, no one has discovered it yet.

  • Shawn Smith

    Simple economics for idiot liberals: There’s an enormous difference between 50 cents and 50 cents *per item*. The one is inconsequential. The other has far-reaching implications (including probably putting some of those people you’re claiming to help out of work.)

  • Shawn Smith

    If you raise prices on everything just a *tiny little bit,* that means, effectively, that the money people already have is worth less. Who does that injure the most? The people who don’t have much money.

  • InformNow

    Is the doctor who would not see a father or his child because they do not have money a Christian? Huh, Dan Savage? And, and, and Obama had to take away long term care OUT of Obamacare because Obama couldn’t afford it! But it doesn’t matter to ask if Obama is Christian, right Dan Savage? We all know Obama is Muslim… Right… Maybe Dan Savage can be Christian and pay $1000./month for ‘Granny’! You do love your “MeeMaw” don’t you Dan?!

  • Stephanie Warren

    Dumbest thing I’ve ever read. The fact his followers think conservatives think that way says a lot about their intelligence.