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Cher: Why can't I ask questions about these darn secretive Mormons?


Cher’s anti-Mormon bigotry is as obvious as her love of unintelligible all-caps rants and disdain for apostrophes. But Wednesday night, the Romney-hating diva decided to reinvent herself as a Mormon truther.

Hey, it’s not that she loathes Mormons — she’s just asking questions.

And who can blame her? Mormonism is clearly a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma. It’s like the special sauce on a Big Mac — will we ever know The Truth™?

C’mon, it’s not like Cher can just walk into any Barnes & Noble and just flip through the Book of Mormon or a reference book on Mormonism. And finding someone who knows anything about Mormonism is damn near impossible.



Cher’s followers were full of brilliant advice about getting to the bottom of Mitt Romney’s religion.


Hmm. Sounds like a conspiracy. And you know who’s awesome at exposing conspiracies? Roseanne Barr.


But Cher had better be careful. Apparently the Mormons don’t want her poking around.



Oh, no worries, Cher’s already acquainted with Mormons’ “magic underwear.” She’s just reading up for confirmation of what she already knows in her unhinged, bigoted heart.



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