Need a laugh?
Last week a Venezuelan patrol ship called the Naiguata sunk after it opened fire and then ramed the RCGS Resolute, a cruise ship with a reinforced bow designed to protect the ship from icebergs as it takes passengers on tours of Antarctica.
Yes, we have video:
Breaking News! The video of the collision between Venezuelan OPV Naiguata and Passenger Ship Resolute is released.@Defaereanaval @GuiWiltgen @CavasShips @CovertShores @Capt_Navy @Mansourtalk @kad_ghani @mahmouedgamal44 @NavalNews @ArmadaFANB @orko_8 @aemres78 @hkilichsword pic.twitter.com/BiWpYlJ9vH
— Naval News (@navalnewsnet) April 5, 2020
Here’s a statement from Columbia Cruise services on the incident which blames the entire incident on the Venezuelan ship who, according to the company, ramed the Resolute in an attempt to steer the ship to a Venezuelan port:
Statement on RCGS RESOLUTE incident
In the early morning hours of the 30th of March 2020 (local time), the cruise vessel RCGS RESOLUTE has been subject to an act of aggression by the Venezuelan Navy in international waters, around 13.3 nautical miles from Isla de Tortuga with 32 crew member and no passengers on board.
When the event occurred, the cruise vessel RCGS RESOLUTE has already been drifting for one day off the coast of the island to conduct some routine engine maintenance on its idle voyage to its destination, Willemstad/ Curaçao. As maintenance was being performed on the starboard main engine, the port main engine was kept on standby to maintain a safe distance from the island at any time.
Shortly after mid-night, the cruise vessel was approached by an armed Venezuelan navy vessel, which via radio questioning the intentions of the RCGS RESOLUTE’s presence and gave the order to follow to Puerto Moreno on Isla De Margarita. As the RCGS RESOLUTE was sailing in international waters at that time, the Master wanted to reconfirm this particular request resulting into a serious deviation from the scheduled vessel’s route with the company DPA.
While the Master was in contact with the head office, gun shots were fired and, shortly thereafter, the navy vessel approached the starboard side at speed with an angle of 135° and purposely collided with the RCGS RESOLUTE. The navy vessel continued to ram the starboard bow in an apparent attempt to turn the ship’s head towards Venezuelan territorial waters.
While the RCGS RESOLUTE sustained minor damages, not affecting vessel’s seaworthiness, it occurs that the navy vessel suffered severe damages while making contact with the ice-strengthened bulbous bow of the ice-class expedition cruise vessel RCGS RESOLUTE and started to take water.
Ready to support anytime, the RCGS RESOLUTE remained for over one hour in vicinity of the scene and reached out to the Maritime Rescue Coordination Centre (MRCC) Curaçao. This is an international body which oversees any maritime emergencies. All attempts to contact those on board the navy ship have been left unanswered.
Only after receiving the order to resume passage full ahead by the MRCC and that further assistance is not required, the RCGS RESOLUTE, currently safely moored in the port of Willemstad, continued sailing towards her destination at Curaçao. A full investigation into the circumstances surrounding the incident will now be carried out.
But that description above is too sterile. READ this thread to REALLY get entertained:
It often seems that the golden age of naval idiocy has disappeared forever.
I'm therefore pleased to note that the Venezuelan patrol vessel Naiguatá has managed to recapture some of this spirit by fighting the dumbest action of the 21st century. pic.twitter.com/FSGAn2iYgY
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
The trouble began when RCGS Resolute, a smallish cruise liner specialising in penguin-bothering, stopped to repair her engines in international waters. pic.twitter.com/HbU4FXQmqi
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
Outraged by this brazen act of maintenance, Naiguatá's captain seems to have decided to order Resolute to a Venezuelan port. pic.twitter.com/Qy23DuYw6V
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
This in itself is a bit weird, given the times we're in. Countries across the globe are trying to persuade cruise ships to dock elsewhere lest their plague-ridden hordes cause a major public health crisis. pic.twitter.com/SHoayVGzum
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
Quite how the Naiguatá's captain thought his superiors would react to him merrily sailing into Puerto Moreno with his potentially infectious captive in tow remains a mystery. pic.twitter.com/onXjEQJqtI
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
Resolute seems to have also thought this was a superbly dumb idea, so radioed head office for instructions.
Naiguatá's captain appears to have taken this delay badly. pic.twitter.com/GURg4rnbsa
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
At this point it's worth reviewing both ships armaments.
Seen here posing moodily in the manner of a teenager that has just discovered My Chemical Romance, Naiguatá had a 76mm main gun, a air/missile defence gun, two smaller machine guns and presumably also some small arms. pic.twitter.com/PyvS48wa0p
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
Resolute, on the other hand, is armed with nothing more deadly than a well-stocked library, Finnish sauna, and "a superb international wine list".
Some of its passengers are believed to have had binoculars. pic.twitter.com/EUkham9uR4
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
It's fair to say that Naiguatá's captain is not to a patient man. With Resolute still sitting there doing nothing he escalated straight past asking nicely and apparently opened fire.
I'm presuming this wasn't with the 76mm main gun, but at this point who knows? pic.twitter.com/LuqV7PGacM
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
Actual gunfire failing to achieve anything in the way of changing Resolute's heading, Naiguatá then decided to commence ramming it in an attempt to forceably change its direction.
This was… unwise. pic.twitter.com/xveg840XSu
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
RCGS Resolute is designed to bounce off icebergs. You know, the sort of thing that opened Titanic up like a can opener.
Naiguatá, on the other hand, was strictly designed to handle water in its liquid phase. pic.twitter.com/6Ky4O1ru0R
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
Needless to say the ramming attempts ended up with twenty extremely pissed off Venezuelan sailors being fished out of the water after their patrol vessel sank underneath them.https://t.co/qHFuicrz0g
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
After an hour hanging around on standby in case it was required to help with the rescue effort, Resolute was left to buff out its battle damage.
So if next time you go on a cruise there's a silhouette of a patrol vessel marking a successful 'kill' on the bow, now you know why… pic.twitter.com/r1GctoVkPq
— @canocola (@Canocola) April 4, 2020
Amazing.
***
Join the conversation as a VIP Member