Gosh, maybe we’re old fashioned but if the Senate Judiciary was bending over backward to make sure we could testify about an incident involving Kavanaugh we thought was important enough to bring to the Senate’s attention we’d probably jump at the opportunity … it seems odd that Ford had demands around her testifying when she is the one who started this whole circus in the first place.
It was Ford’s list of demands that inspired #OtherFordHearingDemands on Twitter, and if any of these are real, this hearing could be a hoot.
Here are some of the best:
Tag-team style testimony — can tag-in Kirsten Gillibrand to answer at any time. #OtherFordHearingDemands
— Doug Powers (@ThePowersThatBe) September 21, 2018
Brilliant.
Kavanaugh can only testify first if he formally submits his nomination withdrawal at the start of questioning. #OtherFordHearingDemands
— Doug Powers (@ThePowersThatBe) September 21, 2018
Or if he submits his answer in the form of a question.
Must wear *I'm with HER* T-Shirt #OtherFordHearingDemands
— The Big Dipper (@star8a8y) September 21, 2018
Yikes.
Kavanaugh must appear in an orange jumpsuit. #OtherFordHearingDemands
— The Morning Spew (@TheMorningSpew) September 21, 2018
#OtherFordHearingDemands a bowl of Peanut M&Ms without the green ones, because Kavansugh is Irish (as best as I can remember).
— G (@TCC_Grouchy) September 21, 2018
But green M&Ms are the best.
Commies!
Must walk into the hearing to Def Leppard’s “Love Bites.”#OtherFordHearingDemands
— Federalist Musket ?? (@Patriot_Musket) September 21, 2018
Love bites … love bleeds.
Great, now that song will be stuck in our heads for the rest of the day.
#OtherFordHearingDemands pic.twitter.com/wVaZXvhf7e
— The Brickhouse (@Brick______) September 21, 2018
YAAAS.
A stake and plenty of brush for the fire. #OtherFordHearingDemands
— The Morning Spew (@TheMorningSpew) September 21, 2018
Would be convenient for the mob.
#OtherFordHearingDemands
Everyone must pronounce “Kavanaugh” with a silent “K” like “knife”. Because they’re silencing her.— Lizzy Lou Who? (@_wintergirl93) September 21, 2018
#OtherFordHearingDemands
According to Ford's lawyer, she requires:
1. All chairs are the same color;
2. She must be lead into the hearing by a bagpiper;
3. No committee member may have a sidepart;
4. All coffee must be fair-trade;
5. A vegetarian alternative must be offered.— (((Road Bear Life))) (@bearshrugged) September 21, 2018
Pat Benatar appears as the opening act. #OtherFordHearingDemands
— Schultz (@muffnbear) September 21, 2018
This is gonna be LIT!
The room must be filled with female witnesses wearing Handsmaid Tale costumes and Kavanaugh has to wear a Silence of the Lambs face mask. #OtherFordHearingDemands
— Matt Snavely (@mattsnavely) September 21, 2018
Don’t give them any ideas.
Every group of 3 questions must form a haiku. #OtherFordHearingDemands
— Joseph??Levine (@Rabbi224) September 21, 2018
she will testify when Kavanaugh is ready to surrender peacefully… #OtherFordHearingDemands
— JEFCON 1 ?? (@TheJeffBurkett) September 21, 2018
She will testify when the rise of the oceans begins to slow and our planet begins to heal.#otherfordhearingdemands
— Schadenfreudelish (@aggierican) September 21, 2018
Cross examination shall be forbidden unless done through a hand-puppet. #otherfordhearingdemands
— Still Cranky (@StillCrankyAF) September 21, 2018
Def Leppard, hand puppets, poetry, and fire …
Are you listening, Chuck Grassley!? (ha!)
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