As Twitchy readers know, Patton Oswalt was seriously beside himself after the Senate gave millions of Americans a tax cut early Saturday morning. Clearly, the idea of Americans keeping more of the money they earn was some sort of super trigger for Oswalt:
Is there any going back after this #TaxBillScam? To America? Does it matter now if Trump is impeached? There’s no America now. Not the one we knew. Sorry, feeling real despair this morning
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 2, 2017
Despair because Americans will get a teeny tiny break in their taxes.
K.
Perhaps we could take people like Oswalt more seriously if they just admitted it’s not the actual bill that upsets them, but the fact that Republicans passed ANYTHING. If say the Democrats gave Americans a tax cut (HAAAA, WE MADE A FUNNY!), they’d be all over the Sunday morning shows today talking about how giving they are because they gave us back our own money.
Greg Gutfeld gets it.
these parody accounts have to try harder https://t.co/zpSrKZjSl0
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 2, 2017
Oswalt really should have just let it go.
Oof. Comedy pointers from Greg Gutfeld. Does this mean I can give exercise and diet tips? https://t.co/ob2vHi1Z7A
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 2, 2017
Ummm.
See what he did there? He went on wikipedia & found out I edited Men's Health 20 years ago! Comedy gold, people! (Note: I don't blame him; he's not exactly on top of things;) https://t.co/8jW26zjXtO
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 3, 2017
Hey, at least he cared enough to look it up, right?
See, the joke is I'm out of shape & eat poorly, so I have no business giving out health advice. You're comparatively awful and clueless when it comes to comedy. Which you just proved by missing the joke (and being defensive about it) https://t.co/bGMd3FVT0Z
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 3, 2017
Recommended
Says the guy being defensive about his own lame joke.
K.
deep breathing…calm yourself. everything is going to be fine. Go outside! talk to someone! https://t.co/a8juPY8fIu
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 3, 2017
Oppressor.
"Calm down" from the guy with three exclamation points and and two typos in his Tweet. Sure Greg. Are you being chased? https://t.co/782IM3b7J0
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 3, 2017
Oh boy. When they start going after typos you know they’ve lost the debate.
just havin fun, comedy sheriff! the last bastion: typos! Patton Oswalt – not just a comedy cop, but a typo deputy! Show us your comedy badge and tell us what's right, bitter man! https://t.co/FjDdshQXvG
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 3, 2017
He’s in such despair.
Greg, you have the saddest "fun" I've ever seen someone have. I'm gonna let you go, this feels cruel. https://t.co/9eyeUeq9SC
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 3, 2017
Cruel to Patton maybe, but not to Greg.
Damn, the comedy sheriff announces he has better things to do! Okay comedy sheriff! Ride off into the sunset! (note PO: I handed your ass to you. Rather than face a logic-problem, you relied on the "I'm a comedian and this rube isn't" trope. And it failed you. Night. ?? https://t.co/owLa8tsNvB
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 3, 2017
Typical.
You’re not a comedian. Got it. https://t.co/d84D6GMbyi
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 3, 2017
Oh boy. Again.
never said i was, comedy sheriff! And that's my point. When you're exposed for your emotional, irrational outbursts untethered to fact – your reflex is to say, "you're not a comic." Fine. You're still an emotional hypocritical wreck. Deal with that. https://t.co/gjeRcC6sWN
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 3, 2017
*popcorn*
I’ll try, Greg. I’ll t-try. Oh God I pruh-pruh-promise I’ll…(wracking sobs) https://t.co/GM7CaigM0D
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 3, 2017
Probably more truth here than we realize.
BTW, I thought you, the comedy sheriff, had walked off into the sunset, with your joke lasso in hand, to rest another day after all this hard work on twitter. What woke you, Captain Punchline? The need to tell everyone who is funny and who isn't? https://t.co/RyjBsO4KpQ
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 3, 2017
Walk away, dude.
(The sure sign of handing someone their ass: having to insist you did and adding an emoji) https://t.co/d84D6GMbyi
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 3, 2017
This isn’t going to end well for Patton.
I thought you went to bed. So you want me to kick your ass some more? Okay: I'll be nice: you're living in a delusional bubble that prevents you from seeing that people who disagree with you aren't all jerks. You're not thinking clearly. https://t.co/2nza8aTBgZ
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 3, 2017
You missed me! How sweet! https://t.co/zYqfk7rHFi
— Patton Oswalt (@pattonoswalt) December 3, 2017
actually, I did! I'm enjoying this. I actually think you're a smart funny person who's like the lady in the first episode of American Horror Story. You're fucked up. Someone has to pull you out of this. I can be that person. Consider this a Twittervention. https://t.co/pulqTmzi83
— GregGutfeld (@greggutfeld) December 3, 2017
And curtain.
Guess Patton didn’t want the Twittervention.
Related:
Pat Sajak CRUSHES all the Lefties whining about tax cuts with a simple ‘reminder’
Join the conversation as a VIP Member