Forget the coronavirus: Joe Biden promises to cure cancer, Alzheimer's, and diabetes if elected

There was a lot going on during Joe Biden’s Super Tuesday victory speech: he mistook his wife for his sister and the stage was rushed by “Let Dairy Die” protesters. So we’re sorry we overlooked the part where Biden promised to cure cancer, Alzheimer’s, and diabetes during his administration.

Biden curing cancer isn’t exactly new; during his 2016 State of the Union address, President Barack Obama put Biden “in charge of Mission Control” for finding a cure for cancer. “Last year, Vice President Biden said that with a new moonshot, America can cure cancer,” Obama told Congress and the nation.

And people ridicule President Trump for putting Vice President Mike Pence in charge of the coronavirus task force.

In any case, here’s Biden promising cures if elected:

Joe Biden promises you that he will cure cancer if you vote for him. pic.twitter.com/LFX6fmAEUD

— ᏔმƦ?ჳ? (@mooncult) March 4, 2020

All this time he knows he can cure cancer, Alzheimer’s and diabetes, and he’s only going do it if he becomes president ??

— SamW?? (@SamW55) March 4, 2020

If Joe cured cancer today his chances of getting elected would go up. Why wait?

— Electro Delecto ⭐️⭐️⭐️ (@ElectricMonk69) March 4, 2020

Only if you elect, otherwise = SOL mate, he’s dying with those secrets.

— Jonas (@jonascameronj) March 4, 2020

And he's been sitting on this ?????? What a terrible person. He will only save lives if you vote for him.

— Nowhere Man (@AkulFred) March 4, 2020

Well, I think we know why he's promising a cure for Alzheimer's.

— Vreivai (@Vreivai) March 4, 2020

"I've only been in government for 40 years but I promise to cure every disease if you just give me 4 more!"

— Marie Coop (@mcoop69) March 4, 2020

Yep Biden will have available on Amazon “Biden’s Cure All” bottle for just $99 and a Vote! Say goodbye to cancer, Alzheimer’s and diabetes! Biden is even worst than Bernie, one will solve all your problems and the other will give you everything for free if you hand them power!

— Rick L. (@RickOn123567) March 4, 2020

40 + years in DC, now he can cure all those diseases???
Dems will say anything to appease the base.

— Ed Kauffman (@EKauffman1) March 4, 2020

Aren’t people fed up with this pandering BS??

— Chris Anderson (@chrisand11) March 4, 2020

But if you don't vote for him, you can just suffer and die.

— Jon Kay (inthamornin) (@KayInthamornin) March 4, 2020

He knows cures are on the way, so he's taking credit for the inevitable in advance. It's an easy promise that he has no power over but can take credit for.

— David Rooks (@Maximura01) March 4, 2020

Joe Biden: Vote for me for class president and I'll also put chocolate milk in the school drinking fountains!

— ElCapitanMarvel (@ElCapitanMarve1) March 4, 2020

That’s pretty close to a Howard Dean moment. That’s really bad.

— Johanna Scharf (@JohannaScharf) March 4, 2020

Onama promised the same

— Pimm's Cup Pelosi ?? (@Sweetbabyginge2) March 4, 2020

Why stop at those three? Just promise to cure every disease. At this point it’s just house money you’re playing with…

— Bassets For Trump (@BassetsforTrump) March 4, 2020