If you’ve ever guarded the door at a venue where Moby was playing, we’re sorry.

The NRA’s suggestion today that every school be protected by an armed guard went over about as well as a lead bullet. As Wayne LaPierre pointed out, we expect armed guards to be present at banks, so why not our schools, which house something much more precious than money? Because security guards are imbeciles, duh.

Oh, and jack-booted thugs, according to Talking Points Memo.

Exit question: if these jack-booted Burger King rejects are unionized, can we still call them thugs?

  • Bob Cordon

    The statists are mad because we’ve come up with a workable idea that WILL save lives. They, on the other hand, don’t know if their longtime desire to do away with guns will get anywhere after Sandy Hook. So glad not to be a liberal loser.

    • orringtonmom (D)

      they have an idea… they are going to “demand a plan”.

  • Bartman231

    Why not? BK rejects got gun guns working for TSA, right?

  • peteee363

    not everybody gets fired from burger flipper jobs. some people get better jobs, and others such as yourself, moby, were never smart enough to flip burgers, and never got past the shake machine, or fench fryer!

    • GaryTheBrave

      “No, Moby! Do NOT stick your hand in the fryer to get the loose fry.” said his first boss.

  • grais

    I wouldn’t be too surprised to find out that security guards have a low opinion of Moby, if they know who he is.

  • Jack Deth

    Hey. I have an idea!

    Let’s really upset these liberal douche nozzles.

    Have the NRA run background and criminal checks of all potential guards.
    Cut down on pedophiles and other criminals ahead of time.
    Then have the potential guards be TRAINED and CERTIFIED by the NRA and local police departments before being assigned a school or schools.

    Yeah… That’s the ticket!

    • GaryTheBrave

      I wonder how many of these rap “artists” could pass a background check to become guards.

  • vino veritas

    LOL! I can only laugh at the stupidity and hypocrisy of these over dramatic infantile liberals. Oh, and then there’s the snobbish dismissal of the same blue collar workers they themselves self righteously claim to champion! Yeah, there’s that.

  • The7Sticks

    Michael Medved crunched the numbers a little earlier today on how much it would cost to put a security guard at every school in America. Willing to fork over sixty billion dollars a year to handle that? And I thought Democrats were fiscally irresponsible.

    • sleazyrider

      No…just give it to Eygpt instead…

    • Jack Deth

      Sure. I’d be willing to cancel a dozen F-35s and a half dozen C-17s. Or an updated AEGIS class cruiser.

      If the program is federally funded. State Run. NON UNION and the NRA does criminal and background checks on all potential employees. To cut down on the number of pedophiles and other criminals in the school system. Then TRAINS and CERTIFIES them. That way they have some skin in the game, too.

      In other words. Use the Fed as a check book ONLY. And keep their fingers out of it as much and for as long as possible.

      • CherDash

        @disqus_sd8CCAl8aq:disqus The only problem with that is that whenever the Fed gets an inch, they take a mile. Once they put a cent in to a program, they entrench themselves.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100002109532283 Jillane Kent

      Don’t his numbers presume newly hired employees whose sole position is that of school guard? In my county, officers that have additional training serve as resource officers for the local high schools and middle schools. We are not a wealthy state and our county is among the poorest, yet their salaries are paid for without massive increases in property taxes. One should not, immediately, dismiss the notion as economically unfeasible or irresponsible.

      • http://twitter.com/thetugboatphil TugboatPhil

        Jilliane, my daughter in law was a SRO for 2 years in my rural, Virginia county. Part of her salary was from a state grant. However, she was THE SRO for the county high school and 3 jr highs. Not sure how we’d do with a mandate for 3 other Deputies.

    • http://twitter.com/thetugboatphil TugboatPhil

      Take it from the fraudsters that are sucking dry EBT, SSDI, Medicaid and half a dozen other welfare programs. The kids being protected would at least have the potential to help the country. The freeloaders are nothing but leeches.

    • Evil Otto

      Democrats are fiscally irresponsible. Besides, $60 billion is chump change to this government, one with racks up yearly deficits that need thirteen digits to write.

    • http://www.pointsofcompass.blogspot.com joated

      Doesn’t have to cost that much if you take doen the “Gun Free” signs and allow those members of the faculty and staff that wish to undergo a little extra training to carry concealed.

    • peteee363

      lots of schools already hire secuirty staff, such as high schools, and inner city schools. why not just arm them, most of the ones around here are ex cops, or new cops looking for extra money. that would cut that number wayy down.

  • George Washington Mclintock

    So, who is going to protect our kids from the Adam Lanza’s of the world? A 98 pound weakling pacifist who breaks out in a cold sweat at the mere mention of violence?

  • sleazyrider

    Or trim the wefare fat..

  • $7610427

    The ignorance never ends with these people! My son’s school has a School Resource Officer…he’s ex military and a police officer. He has several duties besides that of security. His wife is a teacher within the district and he is neither a thug nor has ever worked at BK… We are a small district and have never had any issues with violence.

  • orringtonmom (D)

    aren’t these people aware that there already are armed people in some inner city schools? don’t politicians talk about hiring more police officers a lot? and i didn’t watch/hear/read the NRA statement but did he actually suggest that schools employ fast food flunkies to guard or is that just moby’s geniusly low opinion of people?

    • CherDash

      It’s just his “little idiot” opinion, it’s not what Mr. LaPierre said at all.

  • mdtljt

    So….what if veterans returning from deployment and are leaving the military go thru a thorough psych evaluation to certify mental fitness and are then stationed at schools for security?? The fine men and women of our armed forces are duly trained to protect and it would be a blessing to those who are returning to little or no prospects for employment? Kind of a no-brainer, don’t ya think?

  • https://twitter.com/davidjkramer DavidKramer

    Has anyone checked to see if Moby uses armed guards? That should be enlightening. By the by, if he does, do you think his security detail appreciates being called Burger King rejects?

  • TheOriginalDonald

    Have another Harpoon, Richard. Unless that beer isn’t vegan, in which case sod off.

  • Lucid_American

    Just hire a bunch of union stooges, to be jack booted thugs armed with pellet guns so they can’t accidentally blow their own toes off!

  • $1014973

    Nothing funnier than an extremely gay liberal throwing around stereotypes.

  • TocksNedlog

    And yet another celebutard MISSTATES what LaPierre actually said. Color me NOT shocked.

  • TocksNedlog

    Moby is just pissed at security guards because of all the times his demands of “Don’t you know who I am!” have been met with “No — haven’t a clue.”

  • Jerry J Brown

    When you report these incosequential people, you give them more credit than they deserve. They deserve apathy and to fade into oblivion. Moby was never that famous to begin with

  • Bigeddie173

    Can anyone name a recent Moby song? You are no longer relevant. Go away.

  • Joe W.

    Am I the only one who does not know who the hell “Moby” is??? I know he’s a dick, but…..

  • radicallyalyssa

    His twitter is @thelittleidiot. WONDER WHY?

  • Harlan Hikaru Fox

    You want people to be artists and musicians like you, Moby? Starting going and teaching random people, at your own expense. What good do you think mocking them is going to do?

  • Justin Case

    Everyday the left tells you exactly what low regard they have for you and the high regard they have for themselves.

  • Bob Smooper

    Mobs has a great point but I partially disagree. I think democratic security guards are fine for guarding the children. But republicans cannot be trusted. They don’t like children very much.

    • BeeKaaay

      Actually it is the democrats who don’t like children very much, they’re the ones advocating that children be ripped apart limb from limb, is a good thing. They’re pretty bloodthirsty.