As Twitchy told you, the Washington Post came out with a blistering exposé on teenage Marco Rubio’s “brush with the law.” Rubio, you see, was caught with beer in a public park after hours. In 1990. Scandalous, right?
And it makes us wonder … what other horrible things has he done? Tweeters can only imagine:
@AlexConant and I heard he once opened a bottle with his teeth #RubioCrimeSpree
— Marci (@MarciaCM1) January 21, 2016
https://twitter.com/jeremybhughes/status/690322761164525568
https://twitter.com/rich_beeson/status/690323397155364867
Once tossed a piece of paper in the trash instead of the recycle bin. #RubioCrimeSpree
— Carolyn (@ccarolson) January 22, 2016
.@marcorubio drank the last cup of coffee but didn't make a new pot #rubiocrimespree
— John Burke (@JBurkeNation) January 22, 2016
Snuck a pack of m&m's into the movie theater. #RubioCrimeSpree
— Just Shelly (@akaMaude13) January 22, 2016
Can you believe that @marcorubio pulled the DO NOT REMOVE tag off his mattress? #RubioCrimeSpree
— Just Shelly (@akaMaude13) January 22, 2016
Rumor has it @MarcoRubio consistently puts the toilet paper roll on backwards #RubioCrimeSpree
— Erin Rodewald (@EDRodewald) January 22, 2016
Marco Rubio once played Chess on a checkers board. #RubioCrimeSpree
— United With Rubio (@unitedwithrubio) January 22, 2016
https://twitter.com/thatmattbotkin/status/690328588596305920
Hearing rumors Marco Rubio clicked "I Agree" to a license agreement he never read. #rubiocrimespree
— Michael Hendrix (@michael_hendrix) January 22, 2016
https://twitter.com/thinkhp/status/690330365731340288
Drank red wine with chicken. #RubioCrimeSpree
— Daniel Goldbeck (@DtheGman) January 22, 2016
Recommended
https://twitter.com/JustCrum79/status/690333365648670721
I heard @marcorubio threw away a plastic bottle instead of recycling it… #rubiocrimespree
— Caroline McCain (@ccmccain) January 22, 2016
Rubio was well known as a kid to often get back into the pool LESS than 30 minutes after eating a meal. #rubiocrimespree
— Deborah Sampson (@Debsam1760) January 22, 2016
He cuts the tags off pillows. #RubioCrimeSpree
— Nan Crews (@nancrews) January 22, 2016
Once caught in the hallway without a signed restroom pass. #RubioCrimeSpree
— Fredo N. Twittur (@fredontwittur) January 22, 2016
Left his tray table down and his seat tilted back during takeoff. #RubioCrimeSpree
— Nels (@debitking) January 22, 2016
Pretty sure I saw Marco Rubio double-dip a chip in the cheese sauce. #rubiocrimespree
— Ed Morrissey (@EdMorrissey) January 22, 2016
Lately @marcorubio has been overheard in Mayfair#rubiocrimespree
— Tom Nichols (@RadioFreeTom) January 22, 2016
Leaving just one square left on the toilet paper roll #RubioCrimeSpree
— mrskimp (@mrskimp_) January 22, 2016
Made eye contact with strangers in an elevator. #rubiocrimespree
— Ed Morrissey (@EdMorrissey) January 22, 2016
I heard a rumour that one time in the 6th grade @marcorubio spoke without raising his hand #RubioCrimeSpree
— Avi B. (@avijustin) January 22, 2016
https://twitter.com/BlazerMc88/status/690343401993191424
#RubioCrimeSpree Did not love Lucy.
— 100 Proof (@ChampionCapua) January 22, 2016
he put the empty milk jug back in the fridge #rubiocrimespree
— Laura (@laurakbarr) January 22, 2016
One night, Marco wore dark glasses after sunset. #rubiocrimespree
— BpStucky (@BpStucky) January 22, 2016
Bit the bottom of an ice cream cone #RubioCrimeSpree .@EdMorrissey
— Dannerism (@Dannerism) January 22, 2016
Marco Rubio puts ketchup on his hot dog. #RubioCrimeSpree
— Anita Sia Perpwalk (@NewYearsDani) January 22, 2016
He shampooed, rinsed, and didn't repeat! #RubioCrimeSpree
— Tooth Fairy Denier (@FunkynFortunate) January 22, 2016
@MarcoDaily squeezed toothpaste from middle of tube #rubiocrimespree
— Butzi ???????????? (@ace2blue) January 22, 2016
What's next @marcorubio? Library fines? #rubiocrimespree
— Joe Pounder (@PounderFile) January 21, 2016
Not that! Anything but that!
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Related:
‘Shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die’: The #RubioCrimeSpree catches up to Marco at last!
Hillary who? WaPo’s way too busy digging up dirt on teenage Marco Rubio